Heavy rain fell from the night sky as the silver car speeded through the air above the city. The people on the sidewalk glanced up at the flashing red and blue lights as they passed overhead. No one was particularly surprised to see them; they were a common sight there.

The car began to steadily drift downward as it approached the raised overpass stretching above the town. The superhighway brought passengers many miles across the land at a breakneck pace. Though more would call it a symbol of the future, the poorer urbanites saw it as the eyesore that cast a dark shadow over their homes.

The report had come from right below the highway, near the edge of the shadowy belt that attracted all the city’s crime. The car slowed down and drifted to the street below, bathed in red light through the darkness thanks to the large neon insignia of a cowboy hat. The local Arby’s, famed arbiter of the roast beef sandwich, was always in sight to the people who called the ramshackle tenements nearby their home.

As it turns out, that Arby’s was the police car’s destination. The cruiser lowered itself down to the paved roof of the Arby’s, firmly slotting itself into one of the many spaces in the rooftop parking lot. A man was waiting just outside, fiddling nervously with his fingers and hesitantly approaching the car. He wore a suit that was probably more expensive than the rent in the building across the street, and his hair was neatly combed and almost totally spotless. A small red label was fixed to his lapel; “Angus, Manager,” it read.

Angus neared the car door as it swung open, holding it so in an attempt at politeness. “Thank goodness you’re here!” Angus cried, “The people downstairs have gone absolutely nuts! Hopefully you can calm them down.”

The Ultimate Detective climbed out of the car, casting a dismissive glance the manager’s way. “Look, I’m a detective. Not a miracle worker.”

“U-Uhh, yes…” Angus awkwardly replied, fidgeting with his tie. “Well, in any case, the crime scene is right downstairs. Just come right this way.”

Angus gestured towards a door sticking out of the roof, which was marked “Stairwell.” The Ultimate Detective, who was currently in a quantum state of being both male and female at the same time, retrieved the bag containing their equipment from the front of the car and slammed it shut. They headed to the stairwell, paying no mind to Angus.

As Angus opened the door downstairs, he turned to the detective and extended a hand. “Forgive me, I forgot to introduce myself. I’m Angus. It’s a pleasure to meet you, detective.”

The detective glanced at the hand as if it was some deceased rodent being presented for their consideration. “Sure. A pleasure. I’ll be sure to thank the victim for giving us this opportunity.” They continued into the stairwell, tossing a few more words behind them. “Let’s hurry this along. It’s not like I want to be here.”

Angus awkwardly followed the questionably gendered detective down the cramped stairwell. As soon as they shoved the door open, the noise hit them like a load of bricks. Every table was occupied, and a few people stood near the door, looking outside as if yearning for release from their meat-smelling prison.

One of the civilians, who was sporting an absurdly large beard, looked towards the two as they entered. “Ah, looks like the junior police force has arrived. So how about it? Can we all leave now?”

The detective glared at the civilians and replied, “You all know the rules. The scene has to be made secure. Once you’re all cleared of suspicion, you can leave.”

One family was staying far away from the others. They were dressed in the heights of futuristic fashion and studded with opulence. One couldn't help but wonder what they were doing in the Arby’s.

What must have been the father said, “Oh, please. Surely you can make an exception for us? Unlike most of the riffraff here, I have an important business meeting to get to.”

“Oh, that so?” Someone replied, “Why don’t we show your hoity-toity ass how we take care of ‘business’ round here?”

“Zip it, you two,” the detective snapped.

“And why should we listen to you?” The bearded man said, “You think you’re all that cause you got a special title from the government, but your sleuthing skills meant jack squat when it actually mattered!”

The detective clenched his/her fists and attempted to ignore the rambunctious crowd. He/She turned to Angus and asked, “Where’s the body?”

“The body?” Angus stammered, “Oh, yes! It’s in the kitchen. Just head behind the counter and look straight ahead.”

As the detective stepped behind the counter and approached the kitchen, the bearded man spoke again. “Oh, just going to walk off and leave us here, huh? You’re just like the rich folks who came and built that maglev track!” This comment was met with a host of guffawing.

The detective sighed and turned to address the group once again. “Sir, I strongly recommend you stick to your strengths, whatever they may be, rather than wasting my time with your pointless attempts at humor.”

Before the bearded man could reply, the detective continued past the counter, out of sight. Upon entering the kitchen, they found the body easily. A young man in an Arby's uniform lay on the tiled floor. Clustered nearby were several robots in similar uniforms. They were hunched over with their arms hanging toward the ground - deactivated.

As the detective approached the body, Angus appeared from around the corner. “Yes, there he is…Mr. Ripp Hededd… I must say, it’s quite a shame. He had just been chosen as employee of the month for the eleventh time in a row!” He gestured toward a nearby wall, where an array of Ripp pictures were affixed to the wall.

“Hmm…It looks to me like he was the only employee.”

“Well, he was at the time of incident, yes.” Angus explained, “Our employees work in shifts of one, you see.”

“Well, I suppose that’s respectable. He must have poured his sweat and tears into earning that,” the detective gave Angus a disinterested glare. “What was his reward, then? A penny above minimum wage?”

Angus gasped in shock. “H-How dare you! We care greatly for the financial well-being of our employees! I have half a mind to ask you be removed from this case!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be out of your hair soon enough,” the detective said, “This case seems quite simple to me.”

To Angus’s surprise, the detective was already standing over the corpse, examining the evidence on the scene. Ripp’s body was a gruesome sight to behold. Scars and welts covered his skin, the fabric of his uniform was worn through in a few places, and dozens of bruises marked his body.

“What? Already?” Angus said.

“Yes, I’ve seen this kind of thing before,” the detective muttered with a sigh. “It’s tragic, it's horrible, but it’s hardly surprising. Robots with antiquated programming cause stuff like this all the time.”

“Ah, so it’s the robots’ faults? I expected as much.”

“Yeah, it’s really quite simple.” The detective gently ran their hands across Ripp’s injuries. “The victim was killed by two kinds of wounds. These large ones are clearly burns. Judging by the faint stains on the ground, I’d say those burns came from right here.” They rested their hands on the machine next to them, filled with hot oil.

“The fryer? S-So you’re saying Mr. Hededd was splashed with oil?”

“Sure seems that way. But that wouldn’t be enough to kill him. That’s where we get to these other wounds, these bruises all over his body…I think it was those robots.” They pointed at the crowd of animatronics in the corner. “A few of ‘em probably trampled him.”

“Trampled?” Angus asked, “Why would they do that?”

“Good question. I already have my suspicions. Why don’t you give me the code to those robots, and we’ll find out together?”

Angus seemed troubled by this request. “…What?”

“You heard me. The code. It’s quite simple, really. Just press the button on the back. Even someone like you who uses their fingers twice a day can manage it.”

“E-Excuse me, I--”

“Yes, yes, you have your management confidentiality, you want me to get a warrant, I’ve heard it all before. You’re just delaying the inevitable here.” the detective said, “In case you’ve forgotten, a man died a purposeless death today, and if you want it to actually matter, you’ll get that code. Otherwise I’ll come back with the rest of the precinct, and the algorithm will resume it’s intended course.”

After some more tedious shenanigans that I don’t feel like narrating, Angus handed a memory stick to the detective. He/she shoved it into a small gauntlet or something on their hand (I haven’t decided exactly what yet) which caused a holographic projection to appear in front of the detective. Many lines of code were displayed on it, and they began to scroll through them almost lazily.

“You’re really passionate about this job, aren’t you, Angus?”

“H-Huh?”

“I bet you’ve got your eye on that regional manager job. You probably want to put your prints on every Arby’s in this godforsaken city. But to do that, you’ve gotta have good profits, huh? Good production?”

Angus was sweating profusely and fiddling incessantly with his hands. “Err…yeah, they do usually look…at that…”

The detective fell silent for a few moments. Eventually, they continued, “You’re aware that someone’s made illegal modifications to this code, right?”

“I-Illegal modifications? That can’t be true!” Angus shouted, trying to sound surprised.

“It certainly is. In fact, it looks like these robots have been told to prioritize fulfilling a high production quota over just about everything else. Even the Three Laws. That’s pretty surprising, isn’t it? I wonder who’s responsible?”

Angus fell silent. The detective turned to him. Their eyes were just as disinterested as ever, but their mouth was curved in disgust. “You know what, sir? You’re lucky that I have to maintain an air of professionalism. Otherwise, I’d be letting you know how I feel about this establishment in no uncertain terms.”

Angus put his hands in front of him. “P-Please, calm down! I didn't kill anyone! It was the robots! They didn’t know any better!”

“You’re right. By all accounts, this was an accident. A grand jury would never indict you,” the detective continued, “But make no mistake, everyone with any common sense would know you’re at fault here. If Mr. Hededd hadn’t been caught in the middle of those robots’ frenzy to maximize your profits, he’d still be working here, unburned and untrampled.”

“Look, you can’t pin anything on me.”

“Oh, I won’t try to. That’s not my place.” The detective continued, “Things for you will be just the same for a while. I’m sure you’ll replace Mr. Hededd without care or remorse. I just wanted you to know that you’re complete scum and that’s all you’ll ever be. And once I’m out of the professional realm, I’ll be sure to let everyone know.”

“Now listen! I won’t stand for this!”

“Stand for what? I haven't done anything,” The detective set off for the kitchen’s exit. “My work’s done. I came to solve a case, not listen to your pointless excuses.”

The detective continued out of the room, turning left to return to the main eating area, hoping to get everyone back home and set Ripp’s death behind him/her. However, it quickly became apparent that something wasn’t quite right. An absurdly loud clamor was coming from the room ahead.

As the detective stepped out behind the counter, they saw the room in completely chaos. The tense animosity between the customers had broken out into an all-out brawl, and there seemed no clear end in sight.

The detective just sighed and shook their head.

“…Predictable.”