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Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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~We will become one~

Gender: Male

Location: ~I am here, I can definitely feel you, we are here in the same sunny spot~

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Posts: 1851

Raphael .K. Brice wrote:
Spoiler: 3-1, an Alternate Ending
:acro: Very clever, Mr. Wright, but what motive would I have for killing the ringmaster? I'd like to see you come up with that!
Phoenix Alright then. I'd like to remind the court of the "accident" that happened at the Berry Big Circus. A lion called "Leon" bit a performer, and was promptly shot by Mr. Berry. But what if the lion didn't die? What if... It kept a grudge? What if... THAT LION IS AT THE WITNESS STAND RIGHT NOW!?
Acro I-i-i-mpossible! Th-that would be insane! There's no evidence for something like that!
OBJECT! YOU'RE A LION, DAMMIT, AND I CAN PROVE IT!!!!!!!!!

Lol, the Lion-man in the PW series is Will Powers. Will Powers (That beast... *licks lips*)
Image
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Science: It's cuter than ever

Gender: Female

Location: Michigan

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 3:25 am

Posts: 999

Chinese Infantry wrote:
Yuusaku Maybe I would change it if people BOUGHT MY STUFF, MAYBE! Like my latest unlicensed video: "Musouka presents: the right way to debate pairings", avaliable for...


...
I WANNA BUY THAT. I WANNA BUY THAT. *whine*

Also, in regards to the rest of your funny,
LOL!

The CFTF references ("Friska's to-do list: Kill Gunther Hertz" XD <3) and article at the end were brilliant xD
Image
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

That's one of my rules.

Gender: Male

Rank: Decisive Witness

Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2007 11:10 pm

Posts: 181

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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BIKE MONEY!

Gender: Male

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 3:40 pm

Posts: 957

(Seriously...
I need to stop making funnies based on one user.)


Hobohodo Zenitora Channel Six: Turnabout News vs Freelance Photojournalist Yuusaku


Setting: Channel Six: Turnabout News ~ Studio
Yuusaku : Hey everybody! *audience applause* *door slamed in face*

Accordion head : What was that for!?

Maggy : Whoops! Sorry, Chinese Infantry!

Yuusaku : Anyways, it's 47 o'clock now so.

Ack : What the fuck? There's no such thing!

Image : Told you!

Yuusaku : Lana Skye is also right about there being a new newspaper that's an equivalent to your news station. Mr Marshall, you have a new partner...

Marshall : What? Who's my new partner?

Wellington : Beef Richard Wellington at your service!

Yuusaku : You two are now assigned to track down Phoenix Wright and Maya Fey on their honeymoon.

Marshall : Sure-

OBJECT! : Hold it!

Yuusaku : What?

Ack : What the fuck!? I'm right here and would never marry Maya!

Lana : Also... I'd hate to say it but Mr Marshall is too important to the news station; we won't let him leave.

Yuusaku : Are you sure? It will involve sex-scenes between Phoenix / Edgy and Franziska / Adrian ...

Ack : No... It fucking won't!

Marshal : ...

Gant : *enters in a hurry* For God's sake, do it!

Texas Man : That's HOT!

Spit : No, it's NOT... You dumbass!

Wellington : I don't have all day, will you join us or not?

Hobohodo : (RevFirst) Stop right-

Zenitora : (DarzieP) THEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE!

Hobohodo : That wasn't necessary, DarzieP.

Yuusaku : What a minute, DarzieP. Wasn't you a parrot before?

:Zenny : That's for pussies! *throws thong*

Hobohodo : *eats thong*

Yuusaku : O... K...

Marshal : I'm so confused...

Hobohodo : Don't get any ideas, T3h_Waffleman regretted for doing so... I think.

Zenitora : But didn't you get shot?

Hobohodo : Uh... That's not the point...

Texas Man : STOP IT! I had enough-

Yuusaku : COME WITH US! COME WITH US! COME WITH US! COME WITH US!

Hobohodo Zenitora : STAY WITH US! STAY WITH US! STAY WITH US! STAY WITH US!

Marshal : This is so not hot... (I wish I had a crying smiley like Acro's...)

Last edited by RevFirst on Sun May 13, 2007 11:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

Daian gets what he wants.

Gender: None specified

Rank: Medium-in-training

Joined: Tue Mar 06, 2007 6:20 pm

Posts: 423

That was utterly wierd... I LIKED IT! :D

Image Im hot D:
Working on a sig. Give me a week... month.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

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Posts: 4

Nick and Edgey's Quazi-Mediocre adventures!

Prolouge: Once upon a bad pun

{Some weird Desert, 10:00AM}

Phoenix So then the bartender said, we don't serve breakfast! Hahahahahaha!
Edgeworth Wright. What exactly are we doing out here, anyway? Don't we have anything important to do?
Nick You're right! We're in the middle of the desert! Whose responsible for this? Someone has to pay!
Edgeworth I think his name is Turner Gary!
Phoenix Let's kill him!
Edgeworth Err-
Phoenix Come on, you wuss! This guy always gives us lame parts in stories!
Edgeworth Wright. We've only had one story!
Phoenix Shaddup! Are you with me or not?!
Edgeworth Err- Okay, But who could help us?
Phoenix I know just the dolt...

Meh, I'm bored, so I'm just gonna merge Part one here.

Part 1: The Not so Perfect plan

Phoenix So as I was saying, I know the perfect sucker that can help us.
Edgy Al Gore?
Nick Er- No, We need someone who is much more evil, someone who puts fear in the hearts of others. Someone who's so evil that can kill a flower just by looking at it...
Edgeworth Um... do we know someone like that?
Ack Uh... No...
Edgeworth Ah, the heck with it! Let's just ask Gumshoe!
{Gumshoe's house, 11:20AM}

Eh? Come on, Mario! Jump! No! Don't die!
Edgeworth Gumshoe! Get off your lazy butt and open the door!
Sadshoe Let me beat the first level!
Nick Grr!
{Nick Kicks the door open}
Detective Gumshoe Aah! Phoenix! What are you doing here? My door!
Phoenix Gumshoe. You're gonna help us kill Turner Gary!
Gymshoe Okay, cool. That Turner Gary guy is always making me look stupid.
Phoenix Oh, yeah, since you're an idiot, you get to take all the blame.
Edgy Yeah, also, we wanna go home scott-free.
Gymshoe Okay! I love to take the credit for stuff!
Edgeworth Geez what an idiot...
Nick Be quiet! Now! On to Turner Gary's house!
==End of Part 1==

Okay, I'm EXTREMELY bored, so I'm actually gonna work on Part 2.
{Turner Gary's "Howze", 12:30PM}
Edgy This must be the place. The spelling is terrible, it must be Turner's house.
Nick What a stupid house.
Edgeworth Um. How do we get in?
Eh? I have an Idea!
Nick Quiet, you! You're not getting paid to think, you're getting paid for taking the blam... er- credit.
Detective Gumshoe I'm getting paid?
Phoenix I have the most perfect plan to get in.

{Inside Turner's "Howze", 12:32PM}

Dr. Grey I feel like playing FF3, again.
{Knock, Knock}
Dr. Grey Who's that, Turner Gary don't liek no visitors!
Phoenix It's us, Nick, Edgey, and Gumshoe!
Dr. Grey What do you want?
Phoenix To kill you!
Dr. Grey Okay! Come in!
Phoenix Muhahaha! Just like I planned!
Dr. Grey You better not be here to take away my N64!
Edgeworth You don't have an N64, idiot!
Dr. Grey Good, then there is no reason for you to want it!
Ack Umm...
Edgeworth What?
Eh? Eh?
Dr. Grey Oh, yeah! You were gonna kill me! How, exactly?
Edgeworth We're gonna make you play Pokémon!
Phoenix Then we'll make you watch the Pokémon Movie
Edgeworth Then we're gonna sing the Poké-Rap!
Phoenix Then we'll play the Pokémon TCG!
Dr. Grey Ack! NOOOOO!!
{Turner "Gary" jumps out a 33-story building}
Ack Whoa! What a way to go!
Edgeworth Um. This ''howze'' is 1 story high. How'd he fall that long?
Phoenix Don't question, just enjoy!
Detective Gumshoe Hey, what about me?!
Edgeworth Okay... Gumshoe takes the blame, I mean, Credit, and then we go home!
Phoenix & Edgeworth & Detective Gumshoe Yay!
Phoenix I wonder what's on C-SPAN...
==End of Part 2==

((Yes, there will be more. Maybe 13 more episodes...))
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

Mad Genius

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Location: Arizona

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Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 4:40 am

Posts: 29

Not really funny, but it ponders something I pondered myself

Phoenix :"..."
Maya Fey :"What's wrong, Nick?"
Phoenix :"Goodman..."
Maya Fey :"Huh...? Goodman? As in, Bruce Goodman...?
Phoenix :"Yeah...I don't get it..."
Maya Fey :"Get what?"
Phoenix
Spoiler:
"Like...if Gant killed him in the evidence room at the police station..."

Maya Fey :"Right..."
Phoenix
Spoiler:
"T..then how the heck did he get Goodman's body out of the Police Station and into Edgeworth's car in the first place?!"

Maya Fey :"Hmmm...Want me to channel him?"
Ack
Maya Fey :"What?"
Ack :"Thanks, Maya...but...I don't want to see you as a guy..."
...
...
SMACK!
...
..
Maya Fey :"Jerk..."
Let's be honest...if you have it, you don't need it. If you don't need it, you don't have it. If you have it, you need more of it. And if you have more of it, you don't need less of it.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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"Too Awesome to Die"

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Dr. Derek Stiles OK, Nick, here's the script for the next joke.
Phoenix Thanks...wait a minute. Pretty much all it says is add-lib, and the few things written here are against the me and Maya pairing.
Dr. Derek Stiles Yep.
Maya Fey WHAT! But I thought you liked this pairing?
Dr. Derek Stiles I do.
Nick Then why is this entire joke against us?
Dr. Derek Stiles It's not. It's actually pro you once you get to the punchline.
--------
Phoenix Hello, I'm Phoenix Wright.
Maya Fey And I'm Maya Fey. Today we're here to talk about us.
Phoenix Or, at least what people are recently saying about us.
Maya Fey By that, I mean our pairing.
Phoenix People have been putting me into compromising situations with Maya, making me looking perverted.
Maya Fey Like in that one fic that's currently only one chapter long.
Phoenix You mean Changes. There are scenes in there where I check Maya out, feel get overjoyed when she hugs me, and get a little jealous when she starts talking about cute boys!
Maya Fey Neither of us are like that. We don't plan on getting together.
Phoenix I mean, come on! It's not like our kid will be the savior of the future!
Odoroki *Appears naked in a flash of light* Phoenix, you and Maya must get together and have a kid. The future depends on it!
Maya Fey Well, looks like you were wrong, Nick.
Ack Why are you naked?
Maya Fey I'm just going to assume that it's because innanimate objects can't come through the time stream.
Odoroki Actually, I just happened to be banging my hot detective girlfriend just before my warp timer went up. She seems to know you, Mr. Wright. Pink glasses, cares way to much about science...That ring a bell?
Phoenix ...............Nope.
Odoroki Anyways, try to keep Maya safe. A whipinator robot came to this time to keep your kid from being born. She looks like...
Whip *Appears naked in a flash of light, then turns to Odoroki* DIE!
Odoroki ARG!
Child of Lida_Rose and Aliucon. Married to yuzikichan0! Father of Ha³ and Apollo72.
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Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Mighty Pirate, really!

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Location: Insert Funny Location Here, Am Busy

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Posts: 336

Missle - "Meow."
Shoe - "Woof!"
Polly - "Baaaaaaa."
Von Karma - "Heehaw!"

Larry - "Some people talk in the most extraordinary ways!"
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Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Wolfy...

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Von Karma Grave: Manfred Von Karma

Born- The Original Sin

Died- 2016

The Prosecution Rests...In Peace.



Edgy Hey Wright, I just got Pokemon Pearl!

Phoenix Cool, I got Diamond!!

Edgy

Phoenix

Edgy

Nick

Edgeworth

Nick

Nick This is getting boring...Let's cut to the chase. Battle?

Edgeworth You know it.

*Cue fighting Music, both attorneys stand at opposite sides of the courtroom. A Pokeball is painting on the floor*

:udgy: Court is now in session for the Battle of Pheonix Wright and Miles Edgeworth. Does the Challenger have any opening statements?

Phoenix ...Uh, no.

:udgy: The Challenger may call out they're first Pokemon!

Phoenix ...You're senile, aren't you.

:udgy: Of course not, Keith!

Nick ...I choose You, MayaChu!

Maya Fey Maya!

Edgeworth Go, Franichard!

Franziska *roars, a firey whip brands Pheonix across the face*

Ack YEOWCH! IT BURNS! IT BURNS!


*later*

:udgy: The court finds Franichard Von Zarda Guilty of the injury of PHeonix Wright.

Edgeworth ...Of all the things that brought her a guilty sentence, it was a fellow DS game...
If I could walk the Moonlit Night
Free of all human stress and fright...
If I could Howl my own Wolf Song
If I could right my Every Wrong...
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

clueless

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OBJECT! go! pervertychu!
WTF?!
Dr? Hotti
Bell Boy
Dr? Hotti he meant me, I'm way more perverted than you.
Sal sryy I'm late lol, he meant me.
Nickactually... I was expecting a real pokemon to come out
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Built For The Kill

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A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

*Crawling... Music playing...*

Image
EPISODE WTF: GYAKUTEN SAIBAN CHARACTER GRAND PRIX!!!


Confusion strikes Obi Wan and the Gyakuten Gang yet again! Naruhodou,
Odoroki, Chihiro (Who is now acting like an arse over Kaminogi Souryuu's death), Kyle, and Derek are
being chased by an AT-ST, Mitsurugi stupidly ignited his lightsaber and ended up getting challenged
by Darth Maul and... Anakin Skywalker has challenged Obi Wan... by Darth Vader's orders! Why the

bloody hell are Anakin and Vader separate people?! And what was that last bit about the Badger Droids and the trash for...?


...

Onboard Star Destroyer One, Inner Chamber B-1:

Image Anakin! What... WHY ARE YOU AND VADER SEPARATE PEOPLE?!

Image Why, is that a crime against the Jedi Council, Obi Wan?

Image Obi Wan! We should get outta here right now! Anakin might—

Image Too late!

*Anakin charges at Obi Wan with his lightsaber... but Obi Wan blocks just in time!*

Image Tell me! Why are you doing this?!

Image I'm not going to waste my time talking when I can just... kill you!

*Obi Wan jumps up to avoid Anakin's spinning lightsaber helicopter blade attack! Anakin jumps up as well and retrieves his lightsaber. Obi Wan and Anakin's lightsabers clash again!*

Image *Ignites lightsaber* Obi Wan! You need backup! Let me and Kyouya-kun help you!

Image Minuki-chan! Don't!

*Minuki leaps at Anakin and tries to hit him with her lightsaber!*

Image Don't interrupt the grown-ups, Magician Girl!

*Anakin Force Grips Minuki!*

Image MINUKI-CHAN!!! ANAKIN, YOU BASTARD!!!

*Kyouya charges his Plasma Pistol and fires at Anakin!*

Image *Hit* Argh! What the...?

Image FOCUS, ANAKIN! HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN YOUR TRAINING?!

*Obi Wan leaps at Anakin again, but he blocks! Their lightsabers clash again, and both use Force Push at the same time... resulting in Obi Wan and Anakin to fall backwards and crash onto the metal walls!*

Pearly Mr. Jedi! Look out!

*Anakin gets up and uses Force Pull on the ceiling... and it crashes down on Obi Wan!*

Image AAAAARRRGGGGHH!!!

Image Image Pearly NO!!!

Image *Raises right arm* Looks like it was YOU, who has forgotten your training... "Master".

*Anakin pulls gown the rest of the ceiling, attempting to crush everybody in the room!*

Image MINUKI! KYOUYA! HARUMI! GET OUT OF HERE AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!!

Image BUT—

Image Let's just do what he says, Minuki-chan! C'mon, let's go!

*Kyouya, Minuki, and Harumi attempt to escape, but Anakin uses a Force Pull technique on them!*

Image It would be rude to just run out!

Image D-DAMN IT!!!

*Anakin pushes the three onto a wall and chains them to it!*

Image Prepare to die!

Edgeworth NOOOOT OOOON YOOOOOOOUR LIIIIIIIIFE!!!

*Mitsurugi hacks through the wall with his lightsaber and attacks Anakin!*

Image What the hell?!

Image & Image M-MITSURUGI-SAN?!

*Hobohodo, Akane, and Mayoi enter the room as well, carrying an unconscious Darth Maul.*

Hobohodo Sorry we're late, guys.

Older Ema We had a bit of a handicap... Darth Maul ambushed us!

Maya Fey But Mitsurugi-kun was able to kick his ass and defeat Darth Maul-ttebayo!

Image & Image HE DID?!

Maya Shock THAT'S RIGHT-TTEBAYO!!! LOOK AT MAUL'S FACE RIGHT NOW! HE TOTALLY GOT OWNED! DATTEBAYO!!!

Image Pain... So much pain...

Image & Image ...

Hobohodo Anyway, now that we're here... *Charges Plasma Pistol* You guys are free!

*Hobohodo fires at the chains holding Kyouya, Minuki, and Harumi and releases them! He releases Obi Wan from the metal ceiling as well! Everybody gangs up on Anakin with their blasters, Plasma Pistols, and lightsabers at the ready!*

Image *Raises lightsaber* It's eight against one, Anakin!

Edgeworth *Raises lightsaber* Why are you working for Darth Vader?!

Hobohodo Tell us or you'll get a mouthful of plasma!

Image Grr...

Image Do you surrender now, Anakin?

Image No... No... NO!!! THIS... THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! IT'S UNFAIR! YOU CAN'T CORNER ME LIKE THIS... I'M MORE POWERFUL THAN ANY OF YOU!!!

Edgeworth Oh really? Let's see!

*Mitsurugi uses a lightsaber helicopter blade attack on Anakin and chops off his left arm!*

Image MITSURUGI?!

Image GRAAAAAARRRGGGHHH!!!!

*Anakin yells in pain... When Akane notices something...*

Older Ema Wait a minute... I thought Anakin's mechanical arm was his right one?

Image Then how come it's his left arm that looks fake?!

Maya Shock IT CAN'T BE?!

Wacky Edgy IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!

*The gang looks as "Anakin" dismantles! It was a droid all along!*

Pearly Maya Shock Wacky Edgy Image Image Image Image IT WAS JUST A DROID?!

Pearly Hey... How come Ms. Science Lady isn't screaming in shock with us?

Older Ema (Curse my lack of a shock smilie!)

Wacky Edgy Could it be that she's a droid too, and is planning to kill us right now?!

Older Ema (Say what?!)

Image Holy crap! Akane, you're a droid?!

Older Ema (You too, Kyouya?!)

Maya Shock YOU'RE A DROID-TTEBAYO?! MAYOBUNSHIN NO JUTSU!!!

Maya Fey Maya Fey Maya Fey Maya Fey DIE, DROID, DIE!!!

Older Ema (WTF?!)

Image She's not reacting at all! She IS a droid! Get her, Mayoi-chan!

Older Ema (WHAT THE FUCK?! I'M NOT A DROID!!!)

Maya Fey A!!!

Maya Fey YA!!!

Maya Fey SA!!!

Maya Fey TO!!!

Maya Fey Maya Fey Maya Fey Maya Fey MAYUTO RENDAN!!!

Image I'M NOT A DROID, GODDAMMIT!!! CEASE THE ATTACK!!! BACK!!! BACK, I SAY!!!

Wacky Edgy Hey, she's got a shock smilie now!

Image She's not a droid!

Image Mayoi! Stop the attack—

*Too late! Mayoi pummels Akane!*

Maya Fey That oughtta teach you droids to mess with us-ttebayo!

Image Pain... So much... pain...

Maya Shock Hey... How come she didn't dismantle like the Anakin droid?! Naruttebayo!!!

Edgeworth Uh... Mayoi? *Whispers something in Mayoi's ear*

Maya Fey ...

Edgeworth ...

Maya Fey ... Oops.

Image Hey Akane! You okay?

Image At least I finally got a shock smilie...

*In one of the corners of the room, Darth Maul stirs...*

Pearly Mr. Redface is awake!

Hobohodo Good. Looks like we've got a chance to interrogate him now!

*Everyone begins to close in on Maul.*

Image Darth Maul...

Image What...?

Image We've got a few questions to ask you.

...

Onboard Star Destroyer One, Inner Chamber C-1:

Ack AAACCKK!!!! THAT AT-ST IS STILL CHASING AFTER US!!!

Image *Fires lasers*

Image SHIT, IT'S A DEAD END!!!

Kyle Hyde SAY WHAT?!

*The AT-ST closes in on Naruhodou, Odoroki, Chihiro, Kyle and Derek...*

Image ...

Dr. Derek Stiles No! I'm too young to die!!!

Ack I'm too spikey to die!!!

Image I'm too passionately burning red to die!!!

Kyle Hyde BRADLEY-BOO!!!

*The AT-ST gets ready to fire...*

Young Mia HIYYAAAHH!!!

*Chihiro jumps up and slashes at the AT-ST with her lightsaber! The AT-ST dismantles!*

Ack Image Dr. Derek Stiles Kyle Hyde NO WAI!!!

Young Mia *Deactivates lightsaber* Well that was just a nuisance!

Ack A nuisance?! Sensei, it tried to kill us!

Image Yeah! A large Imperial Vehicle with a hell of a lot of firepower with the intent of blasting us all to space dust is hardly what I'd call "a nuisance", Chihiro-san!

Young Mia But still! You've got lightsabers! Why didn't you use them?!

Ack But...

Young Mia No buts!

Nick (Well, aren't we grumpy today, sensei...)

Odoroki (Yeah, you got that right, Naruhodou-san!)

Dr. Derek Stiles ... Are you two reading each other's minds?

Odoroki Says who?

Kyle Hyde ... Okaaay... So, now what? Now that the AT-ST's destroyed... What do we do?

Young Mia We need to find the cells where Vader's keeping the prisoners!

Phoenix Do you know where they are?

Dr. Derek Stiles Eh... Actually, the two of us were kept in a maximum security cell.

Kyle Hyde That means we have no friggen idea where the other prisoners are.

Dr. Derek Stiles We didn't even know that there were other prisoners!

Kyle Hyde Yeah, that damn Interrogation Droid can make you lose a few brain cells desu.

Nick Oh, great! Now what do we do?

Young Mia We have no choice but to keep moving on till we find the prisoners. Let's go!

Image But Chihiro-san! We just spent 30 minutes running from a deranged AT-ST! Can't we have a break?

Young Mia No.

Image But—

Young Mia I said "no"... Or didn't you hear me?

Image Aww, man!

Young Mia All right, we're moving on! Looks like this chamber extends through that hallway over there!

Nick (Why did sensei have to turn into suck an arse?)

Odoroki (Isn't the answer obvious, Naruhodou-san?)

Nick (... Oh yeah! THAT THING...)

Dr. Derek Stiles Am I the only one freaked out about those two being able to read each other's minds?!

Kyle Hyde Hey man, everything borders on the weird now. For all we know, Darth Vader could pull off a Deus ex and make that AT-ST come back to life!

Dr. Derek Stiles Kyle! Don't say things like that! It might come true!

Kyle Hyde Aww, come on, Derek! YOU KNOW DEAD THINGS CAN'T COME BACK TO LIFE!

...

Onboard Star Destroyer One, Control Room:

*Darth Vader stares into space while his theme music plays...*

Image *Insert signature breathing here* Have you fulfilled your task yet?

Image Yes, Master. Obi Wan fell for the droid trap, and I was able to do what you told me to do while the others were distracted.

Image That's good...

Image However, I've got some bad news.

Image *Turns around* Bad news?

Image Yes, Master. It seems one of the Gyakuten Gang, Mitsurugi Reiji, has been able to defeat Darth Maul. He's been captured by Obi Wan's team.

Image Darth Maul was captured? By... Mitsurugi Reiji?

Image My apologies. His English name is Miles Edgeworth.

Image E-Edgeworth?! MILES EDGEWORTH?! EDGEWORTH DEFEATED DARTH MAUL?!

*Vader suddenly goes berserk!*

Image I-Is anything wrong, Master?

Image *Calms down* It's nothing... So Maul has been captured. That's not a good thing.

Image I know. That's why... I took your earlier suggestion and put some consideration in it.

Image My suggestion? You mean...

Image Yes, Master. My... new apprentice.

Image But he's dead!

Image Hehe. Dead? No. Grievous may have stabbed him with a lightsaber, but don't forget... I studied under Darth Sidious. I was able to learn the dark technique of ressurecting the dead. I have taken care of everything. My new apprentice is in a prison cell right now, and I shall be attending to him shortly.

Image Is that so...? I see. You have done well, Anakin.

Image Thank you, Master. *Evil grin*

...

Onboard Star Destroyer One, Prison Cell:

Von Karma Well, well, well...

Damon Looks like the dipshit's awake.

Von Karma Quite a surprise, really. Who knew he'd be able to survive that?

Damon Hehe, definitely not me! But it must've been fun for him, swimming and all that...

Von Karma Swimming in toxic waste because those numbskull droids thought he was a dead animal?

Damon WHAT? At least he still went swimming!

Von Karma Gant, you idiot! Sometimes I wonder why we're even cellmates!

Gant Aww, don't be so grumpy! You know you're naturally attracted to me—

Taser SHUT UP!!!

Gant Oh yes! More!

Taser WILL YOU JUST DIE ALREADY?!

Gant Either that or I go into the kiddie pen and—

Image WHERE THE FRIGGEN HELL AM I?!

Taser ...

Gant ...

Von Karma Ah, so you're really awake now...

Damon Surprise, surprise, eh? Welcome to our prison cell. You're our new cellmate!

Javado I'm what? Grievous! Where's Grievous?!

Gant HOH HOH HOH HOH HOH!!! GRIEVOUS? HE'S DEAD!!! *Claps*

Von Karma Died in an explosion, no less!

Javado So... If he's dead, then why the hell am I in a damn prison cell?!

Von Karma Are you that stupid, boy?

Damon ... Or didn't you hear the news?

Javado What news?

Gant EVERYBODY THINKS YOU'RE DEAD!!! OHOHOHOHOHOHO!!! *Claps*

Image WHAT?!

Von Karma To be more specific, someone saw you get stabbed by Grievous's lightsaber, and left you to die!

Damon And it was one of your comrades, too!

Image WHO THE BLOODY HELL IS THAT IDIOT WHO LEFT ME TO DIE?!

Von Karma Mia Fey!

Gant Ayasato Chihiro!

Karma Scream Gant, you idiot! That's the same person!

Gant I KNOW! HOH HOH HOH!!!

Javado ...

Von Karma Hey... Why'd he suddenly become quiet?

Damon I dunno, but since nobody's looking... I'm gonna sneak into the kiddie pen and—

Taser IDIOT!!!

Javado ... It can't be...

Damon Hmm? Looks like he's talking again!

Javado ... It's not true...

Von Karma What the hell are you mumbling about?

Image IT'S... IMPOSSIBLE!!!

Damon Looks like he's moaning about something—

Enguard Alright, all you shitheads! Enough talk! You're making my "refreshing like a spring breeze" self get a headache!

Karma Scream Not HIM again...

Javado Who is that retard?

Damon Outoro. He's a prison guard. He thinks he's SOOOO awesome because of his "refreshing like a spring breeze" personality... but he's not!

Enguard Hey oldie! I heard that!

*Outoro approaches Gant.*

Enguard You don't have any right to talk about me like that!

Javado And why not?

Enguard Hey, I wasn't talking to you! Either ways, I AM awesome. Hell, I heard one of the droids say that Vader promoted me to Storm Trooper! I'm so... eviler than you.

Karma Scream "Eviler"? That's bullshit!

Gant You always make us laugh, Outoro!

Enguard Shut up! I AM eviler than you... Eviler than all of you!

Javado ... No, you're not.

Enguard Say what?

Javado I said... "No, you're not"... Or didn't you hear me?

Damon Line-stealer!

Enguard And what makes you say that, newbie?

Javado ... You know that taste you get in your mouth when you drink orange juice and then brush your teeth?

Enguard Augh, I hate that!

Javado I LOVE IT!!!

Enguard WHAT?!

Javado Do you like kittens?

Enguard ... Y-Yeah...

Javado I KICK THEM!!!

Enguard GASP!

Javado And that gravy you're drinking...

Enguard N-NO!

Image I PISSED IN IT.

That's Gotta Hurt NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

*Outoro runs away.*

Gant W-Whoa!

Von Karma You scared away Outoro!

Javado Hmph. He wasn't that hard to beat. Easily a real loser.

*Someone suddenly opens the cell doors!*

Image Ah... You're awake...

Damon & Von Karma M-MASTER ANAKIN!!! *Bow down*

Image Don't waste your energy bowing down to me, fools! I'm not here to see you.

Damon & Von Karma Y-YES, MASTER!!!

*Anakin approaches Souryuu.*

Image It must be a really bad feeling, isn't it? Grievous stabbed you in the stomach once, and people, nay, your own comrades, start spreading the word that you're dead...

Javado ...

Image And it must hurt more if that comrade was your own lover, correct?

Javado ... What the hell do you want?

Image First I'm going to ask you what YOU want. No. Don't bother answering. You want revenge, don't you?

Javado Revenge?

Image That's right. You have hatred—

Image HEY, I HAVE HATRED, TOO!!!

Image Shut up, Sasuke! YOU LACK HATRED!!!

Image Grr...

Gant Hey Sasuke... Are you over 18?

Image N-No...

Gant OHOHOHOHOHO!!! Come with me to my office!

Karma Scream Gant, you idiot! Not while Master Anakin is here! Let's go!

*Gant, Karma, and Sasuke leave.*

Image A-Anyway... You... You have hatred! You have anger! I sense it in you... You want to unleash it, don't you? You want revenge more than anything! You've been betrayed by someone who's supposed to love you! How do you feel about that? ANGRY?!

Image YES!!!

Image Haha, that's just... perfect. Tell me your name!

Image K-KAMINOGI... SOURYUU...

Image Not anymore!

*Anakin extends his hand and performs Force Lightning!*

Image GAAAHH!!! WHAT ARE YOU...?!

Image From now on, you are... DARTH GODOT!!! JUST LIKE THE ORDINARY GODOT... BUT 100 TIMES MORE EEEVIIIL!!!

Godot Yes... Master...

...

Onboard Star Destroyer One, Hangar:

Phoenix Hey! It's Obi Wan and the others!

Maya Fey Naruhodou-kun!

Image Did you find the prison where the Alderaan captives are being held?

Odoroki Not yet, but we found Kyle Hyde and Derek Stiles!

Dr. Derek Stiles Yo.

Kyle Hyde What up?

Odoroki So what did you guys find?

Older Ema Well, we were ambushed by Darth Maul...

Edgy But I kicked his ass!

Nick Yeah... Sure, Mitsurugi...

Edgeworth But it's the truth!

Kyouya Anyway... Obi Wan interrogated Darth Maul, and he told us that Darth Vader's planning to take over the galaxy!

Nick No surprise there...

Young Mia But why did he need to capture the people from Alderaan?

Image Maul fainted before he could get to that part, unfortunately...

Odoroki Hmm... Don't you guys find it strange?

Minuki Strange?

Hobohodo What are you talking about?

Odoroki First we encountered General Grievous... Then you guys were ambushed by Darth Maul... And we were chased by an AT-ST.

Older Ema What are you getting at, Odoroki?

Odoroki I think Darth Vader knew that we were coming. That's why he gathered all those henchmen!

Edgeworth B-But... We finished them all off!

Image Except for Anakin...

???: Or me!

*A voice is suddenly heard! Everyone with lightsabers ignite them immediately, while the gun-weilders prepare to shoot at anything that moves...*

Ack Where did that voice come from?!

Young Mia *Holds lightsaber* It sounds... so familiar...

???: What's the matter? Can't even recognize me?!

*The owner of the voice jumps down from a platform above!*

Ack Sensei! Watch out!

Young Mia *Turns around* What the?!

Image


Ack Wacky Edgy Maya Shock Pearly Image Image Image Image Image NO WAI!!!

Godot Surprised to see me?

Ack & Wacky Edgy GODOT?!

Godot That's DARTH GODOT, bitches!!!

*Godot uses Force Push on Naruhodou and Mitsurugi and shove them onto a wall!*

Maya Shock Naruhodou-kun! Mitsurugi-kun!

Godot Why, you wanna be next, Mayoi?

Maya Shock GAH!!!

Godot *Turns to Chihiro* Hehe... Surprised, kitten? Thought I was dead? Or would you rather find out what death feels like yourself?

*Godot prepares to attack!*

Maya Shock Pearly Image Image Image Image Image WATCH OUT!!!

... TO BE CONTINUED.
Image
I do not tolerate bullies. Good day.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
User avatar

Do you see the black one...or the white?

Gender: Male

Location: IN SPACE!

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 12:06 pm

Posts: 6664

Lol! That was amazing as always Al! My favorite part had to be when all the bad guys from Phoenix Wright in the prison cell exchanging their lines! Gant really cracked me up!
On April 3, 2016, Court Records Forums experienced a miracle upon that day.
CatMuto wrote:
Pierre wrote:
Man...that looks dull...this actually makes me worried for KH3 (since that team worked on the battle system)


I feel the same
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Super Tuff Pink Puff

Gender: Male

Location: Total Post Count: 3,050 + 4,000 and more

Rank: Donor

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 4:02 am

Posts: 4796

*squeals like a fangirl* Orcaizer Al, That was so freakin' amazing and funny at the same time. I want to how this is going to end, I can't even predict anything.

Also, That whole Orange Juice that with Outoro Enguarde seems to remind me of Earthworm Jim for some reason. Yuusaku
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

Struck by a blunt objection

Gender: Male

Location: Denmark

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Sun Feb 25, 2007 5:12 pm

Posts: 1472

Great one, Orcaizer Al. I especially like how you gave the imageshack frog a role.

Oh. Wait.
Image
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
User avatar

BIKE MONEY!

Gender: Male

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 3:40 pm

Posts: 957

(Author's note: Thanks for the comment pals! Here's another one...
It's funny that I've completly forgot about this...)

Image
Part Five: Rise From The Bullshit
Writers: attorney@law, DarzieP, Gerkuman, mario66, mike2115, psychonautical, RevFirst, Shadowpower709, Wizard Anon.

Spoiler: Part One: The Madness Begins
Image
Part One: The Madness Begins
Writers: DarzieP, mike2115, RevFirst, Shadowpower709.

This is simply a cleaned-up version of the game Channel Six: Turnabout News.
I've redone the first few parts to make more sense out of all this.
All the jokes are by their respective writers.


Setting - The Studio (On Stage)
Lana : Good evening and welcome to Channel Six: Turnabout News. I am the anchorwoman, Ms Skye. The top story tonight: After being held captive for several days, Miles Edgeworth goes on a murderous rampage for claiming to have missed his 'Alone Time' several times over. We go live to Ms Byrde, reporting on site.

Maggy : Thank you, Ms Skye. We're here on Sixth Street where Miles Edgeworth had been released from the Detention Center earlier this morning. He had been held for three days on murder charges, but was quickly proven innocent later on. However, Edgeworth had said something about missing his 'Alone Time' and ran off to get that done. Whatever that is, the scene was brutal when he made his escape. He punched two police officers in the stomach, and ripped out the jugular of a third. Now he is truly guilty of murder, but he did manage to return to his home, where it is expected that his 'Alone Time' got done. The murder trial will be held tomorrow.

Lana : I believe that's called 'irony', Ms Byrde.

Maggy : Sadly, that's the fucking definition of 'irony', Ms Skye. Back to you.

Lana : And Now we go back to Mr Wright's Wax Philosophical Power Hour. He is one sorry excuse of a philosophist.

Phoenix : I'm gonna pretend you didn't say that... Anyways, is it true that animals now have too much of a right? We have Missile to dicuss with us about this.

Missle : I hope this turns out to become a bloody good show...

Phoenix : ...So why not tell us about how human and animal rights aren't balanced enough?

Missle : ...

Nick : ...

Missle : WOOF! WOOF!

Ack : Godot! Give the voice-box back!

Godot : Never! *brings out cape and disappears*

Nick : ...Back to you, Ms Skye.

Marshall : I'm not a woman, Mr Wright... That's hot.

Lana : Mr Marshall, you're the anchorman so you need to be professional.

Marshall : What's your point?

Lana : So can you go one day without saying "That's hot"?

Marshall : Nooooo.

Lana : *puts head in hands* Just cut to the damn commercial.

During the commercials - One man paitently waits...
Dr. Grey : The weather girl better be right this time or there will be hell to pay!

Image : HELL!

Setting - The Studio (On Stage) After Commercial Break
Marshall : Wer're back and now to Minuki with the weather report.

Minuki : There's a 100% chance of falling vans!

Dr. Grey : *checks the window* They're goddamn falling trucks! Prepare for your demise, liars!

Image : Muah-ha-ha-ha-haaa!

Lana : Are we finished with the crazy doctor stunt? That shit freaks me out.

Dr. Grey : MWAHH AH AHA AH.

Godot : Shut the fuck up, ho.

Dr. Grey : Awwww.

Lana : Mr Godot! Why are you here?

Godot : I'm the one saying the latest coffee related news, bitch!

Lana : Okay... And now to Ms Byrde with the story about Angel Starr recently adding Judge Udgey to her 'Still the other boyfriend'.

Maggy : Judge Udgey, what are your thoughts about this?

Judge : *Munch* *Glomp* *Mumbling* isten se's hawt c s0 l1k3

Maggy : Unfortunately he's too busy eating a box lunch Angel Starr gave him. Back to you.

Afterwards...
Marshall : In local news, Acro stopped crying. This is due to his tear ducts stopped functioning properly.

Maggy : Thanks, Mr Marshall. Hello Acro. How are you now that you're no longer crying?

Acro : I like being emo so I'm gonna keep crying.

Maggy : *rolls eyes* Interesting. *yawns and pushes wheelchair by accident*

Acro : NYAAAARGH! *falls down stone steps*

Maggy : *slaps head* Crap, that's a lawsuit... And I just broke my glasses. Oh no! There goes my hat...Back to you, Lana!

Lana : We'll be holding auditions for weather girl because our last one was killed by Turner Grey, more news on that tonight.

Afterwards... Again...
Lana : Back to Ms Bryde. She has said to have breaking news at Angel Star's flat. Back to you, Ms Bryde.

Maggy : *cameraman shows Gregory alive but drunk and naked* I've gotten my myself some new pair of glasses but as you can see-

Angel Starr : Stop! You know too much!

Maggy : But-

Angel Starr : Enough! *blocks the camera*

Lana : ...We've seem to lost her, there... oh well! And now to the new weather girl auditions.

Damon : ........

Lana : You're not even female.

Damon : I know...

Lana : ...Back to you, Mr-

Larry : *blocking the camera* Olly, olly, olly!

Lana : Who is this guy!? ...Excuse me, sir! Can you please step aside-

Larry : *starts to strip* Olly, olly, olly!

Lana : ...Back to anyone! *takes some aspirin*

To be continued...

Spoiler: Part Two: Who Writes This Shit?
Image
Part Two: Who Writes This Shit?
Writers: DarzieP, mike2115, RevFirst, Shadowpower709.


Setting - The Studio (On Stage)
Maggy : There is a recent report on the latest aspirin recall. This is due to certain company-made aspirin actually increase headaches rather than reducing them. Good thing that I usually take advil instead.

Franziska : Advil. Brought to you by my whip *crack*

Marshall : It's now the Culture Show with Mr- We have a Culture Show!?

Lana : Not really, I guess we might as well kick this guy out sooner or later...

Marshall : ...That's hot!

Lana : *slaps forehead*

Garyuu : Walcome to my Culture Show...

Lana : ...

Garyuu : Punch the keys for God's sake!...

Marshall : ...

Garyuu : Yes Yes! Your the man now dog! *shows credit*

Lana : Security! *takes more aspirin* Ouch! It's like they don't even work! And now for a commercial break. We'll be back.

The commerical with... Mr Wright!?
Kyouya : Everybody get naked! *shot*

Maya Fey : Oh crap! I did it again.

Phoenix : I can be your attorney since I've played.....Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney*!

Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney*
*NOT APPLICABLE AS AN ATTORNEY QUALIFICATION.

Odoroki's house
Odoroki : Wait wait wait, what?! I've been studying Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney for my degree! Those bastards told me it includes college credit!

Setting - The Studio (On Stage) After Commercial Break
Lana : Hi and we're back! In local news, Redd White has recently became blind. It is said to be caused by too much... Bling-bling?... Over to you Ms Byrde.

Maggy : I am now with Redd White about-

Bling Bling : Getting blind from my bling!? How preposterous!...

Redd's White : Ahhh!

Maggy : Back to-

Image : Why God? Why!?

Maggy : Back to you, goddamn it!

Marshall : And now for the Texas Power Hour.....

Marshall : ...

Marshall : Shit, I dunno what to say. Back to you Ms Skye- What the?

Judge : In other news, someone is having way too much fun with these situations! This judge finds them guilty.

Maggy : How'd you get into the studio?! *chases him off*

Lana : Ms Byrde, he was here for the interview of being Angel Starr's 'Still the other boyfriend'. Remember? Oh whatever... And now for the daily local video feed. The follow has been submitted by Mr Marshall.

Image

Lana : ...

Marshall : What?

Godot : That's hot.

Edgeworth : Stop right there!... Why aren't I'm included!?

Lana : ...........................

Wacky Edgy : Stop staring at me like that! I'll leave.

Marshall : That's how we look at girls in Texas.

Phoenix : Ahem. Now I have a guest, Penny Nichols who is eager to show us something.

Image : Can I show you my Pokemon now Mr Wright???

Nick : Who's idea was this shit?

Lana : Not sure... And now we go over to Mr Gumshoe for the latest movie reviews. Over to you Mr Gumshoe.

Image : Shrek the Third made me horny!

Lana : ...I'm not getting paid enough for this.

To be continued...

Spoiler: Part Three: Expect The Unexpected
Image
Part Three: Expect The Unexpected
Writers: CBLuigi, Chinese Infantry, DarzieP, Liam-e, Naruhodou-san, RevFirst.


Setting - The Studio (On Stage)
Lana : And now over to Mr Wright with his quote of the day.

Phoenix : "The world is quiet here." - Lemony Snicket, A Series Of Unfortunate Events.

Lana : And now over to-

OBJECT! : Did you hear me!? The world is quiet here!

Lana : Yes I heard-

OBJECT! : I said the world is fucking quiet here!

Lana : I heard you already!!

Nick : Sheesh, no need to yell. A simple "I heard you" would-

Lana : Get out!

Ack : EEK! *runs*

Lana : And now for the commercials.

Backstage During Commercial Break
Marshall : Before I get home, I think I'll go get drunk and beat up some hookers, how about you, Ms Skye?

Image : Well I feel like stealing money from charity. I don't need it but I love the adrenaline.

Image Image

Ini Mimi : Being like the new cameragirl and all, I'm like so sorry. I... like... forgot to turn the camera off; you're still... like... on air.

Image Image

Sal : LOL. 7h47 5uX0r5 4 u!

Godot : Get this fat bitch out of here.

Image : N0! 1 w4nn4 533 b00bs!!!

Nick : What an a55h0l3.

Larry : Wait, I'm supposed to be the annoying guy.

Sal : LEIK WH0 C0uld tIS n00b B?

Butz : THIS IS SPARTA!

Image : Why in God's name are they wrestling... Naked!?

Image : ...I'm betting for Da Butz!

Gant's House
Gant : Jolly! Porn on the news channel!

Kurain Manor
Pearly : What's the dangly thingy between Mr Butz's legs.

Maya Shock : Pearly, turn it off!

Back at Channel Six Studio - After Commercial Break
Lana : Hello and we're-

Ack : The yaoi fics empire will expand to include Sal / Larry

Minuki : Let's just get to the weather already!

Lana : Wait... Wait a minute... weren't you killed by Turner Grey?

Minuki : ...Magic.

Lana : But-

Image : Magic!

Ini Mimi : We're on in 5, 4, 3...

Image : ...Hello and Welcome to Channel 6: Turnabout News. In today's news, Damon Gant has started a gang-rape band in prison along with Manfred von Karma and Redd White.

Nick : But-

Lana : They've recently been arrested for child pornography. And Mr Marshall is at the prison.

Marshall : Thanks Ms Skye. Damon Gant, what prey do you and your cellmates usually go for?

Gant : Children!

Redd White : Pedo...

Von Karma : I love incest. (Oh noes!)

Marshall : Interesting...

Gant : Now take off your clothes, cowboy. We're gonna have a Brokeback Mountain party!!

Image : Back to you Ms Skye- Ahhhh! Get the fuck awa-

Lana : Wow. I do feel sorry for Mr Marshall. How abo-

Edgeworth : I hope that things get better for him.

Image : Why the fuck are you here!?

Edgeworth : ...

Edgy : Can I be the new anchorman?

Lana : ...

Edgy : Come on... At least until Mr Marshall's finished being raped and-

Lana : ........

Edgeworth : You win this round. *leaves*

Godot : What a faliure. *sips coffee* What the fuck!? Tea!? Dammit Mr Edgeworth!

Edgy : Justice is served! *runs away*

Yuusaku : Hello everbody! *audience applause*

Phoenix : Chinese Infantry?

Yuusaku : Yeah. I'd like to audition for the news. I could do a segment on the latest products on the market.

Lana : : Show us what you've got?

Yuusaku : In shopping news, Microsoft released the Xbox360 Elite, which is just a black 360 with an HD-DVD player and more room. Still, it is better than buying a PS3. Back to you!

Morgan : Absolutely no!. We shall not have any of the product news!

Nick : *whispers to Ms Skye* Who the fuck is she?

Lana : How the fuck should I know?

Yuusaku : I want the opinion of someone who doesn't have a live badger shoved up their ass...

Morgan : Good sir! I'm going to fuck you up! *brings out grenades*

Yuusaku : Bring it, bitch! *pulls an AK*

Marshall : *sees Croik walking in*

Image : *locks her out*

Image : I'll settle this flame war myself-

Phoenix : No, I will! You two should kiss and make up, right now!

Yuusaku Morgan : NO!

Phoenix : Oh really? Well lets just say that arguing about something minor like this thing is like winning the Special Olympics; if you win, you're still retarded.

Phoenix : ...

Lana : I steal money from charity but that was just cold...

Yuusaku Morgan : He's right, we're sorry. *love tackles*

Image : ...

After The "Love Tackle"
Yuusaku : Chinese Infantry Live Volume 1. Watch how I talk about the latest gadgets and fight off Morgan Fey. Since it involves my funnies, it will be X-Rated and you will shell out 6 easy payments of $19.99 for it! I'll be off now to burn down Darzie P's house.

Lana : ...O.K. Hope to see you again. And now over to Mr Gumshoe's movie review...

Image : Blades of Glory is GAY!

Lana : ...And now to Mr Wright with his philosophical musings!

Hobohodo : I'm staying silent about that.

Marshall : And now the weather with Minuki.

Minuki : Tonight, the weather in Scotland will be generally cloudy, with a spot of rain. Some clouds are drifting north from England over Edinburgh and Aberdeen. Dundee is rather cloudy, windy and cold at only 3 degrees calcius. Drifting closer to the border, we can see a lot of heavy rain and-

Lana : Hold on, Minuki. We're in Los Angeles, California.

Minuki : California? Where's that?

Lana : Look at the map.

Minuki : Huh...? I don't see it...

Minuki : Is that anywhere in Scotland?

Lana : Try again, Minuki.

Minuki : Um... um... can you come back to me?

Lana : *sigh*... okay, Minuki. Back to you, Ms Byrde.

Maggy : In related news, Matt Engarde has died today from gravy saturation. It has now come to light that Engarde's death was self-inflicted. Before he saturated himself, he is purported to have said, "I'll see you fuckers in hell!" and then laughed. Back to-

Hobohodo : POW!

Marshall : What are you-

Hobohodo : Shhhh! The walls have ears!

Marshall : Huh?-

Hobohodo : ...Watch out for the mayonnaise...

Marshall : ....

Hobohodo : ...OR IT WILL BE EASTER ON YO' FACE!

Lana : ...Yeah, we're now used to expecting the unexpected here...

To be continued...

Spoiler: Part Four: What The Hell?
Image
Part Four: What The Hell?
Writers: Android 21 3/7, DarzieP, Gerkuman, Liam-e, mario66, Naruhodou-san, Shadowpower709, RevFirst.


Setting - The Studio (On Stage)
Lana : It's now Minuki with the weather report... Have you found California yet?

Minuki : Is it here...?

Lana : That's Japan.

Minuki : Um... here?

Lana : That's Kenya.

Minuki : What about... there?

Lana : That's Hawaii.

Minuki : Can you come back to me?

Lana : *sigh* Now to you, Mr Marshall.

Marshall : Thanks Ms Skye. An urgent report has come in about an earlier earthquake. Ms Bryde is at the scene.

Maggy : Thanks you Mr Marshall. *trips down stairs* We have found the source off an earlier earthquake. *high heel breaks* Umm… Mr Grossberg, could we have a few words?

Grossburg : *farts and smog erupts from ass*

Maggy : Oh noes! I'm choking.... *jacks car then crashes against 10 feet tall tree*

Maggy : Now to you Mr. Wright!

Edgy : And know I'll be talking to-

Nick : You're on my seat, Edgeworth.

Edgeworth : So?

Image : So which vanilla-face will I be talking to?

Ack Edgeworth : Shut up!

Image : ...Player haters!

Lana : And now to Godot with the latest coffee update.

Spit : This is fucking cold!

Lana : ...And now for the sports new... We have sports news?!

Lotta Hart : Y'all do now. And rumor has it that apart from me taking this job because they don't have a gossip editor, Larry Butz has become a bullfighter. He was reported as saying...

Larry : Um, could you let me out please. My girlfriend said that there were Tacos here, and that Bull's staring at me!

Lotta Hart : Rumor also has it that Mr. Butz was insured before the incident. Back to you Ms Skye.

Lana : Whatever... And now to Mr-

Sadshoe : I'm too poor to afford movie tickets...

Nick : Then how could you have-

Image : Wild Hogs has more ass than a donkey farm!

Marshall : That's hot!

Godot : Yeah, I know!

Ini Mimi : Like my new camera?

Lana : Yes, Ms Miney. And now th-

Godot : Coffee!

Lana : Fine. Coffee, whatever...

Matt : Hey, dudes. Sicne you're in the coffee break, want me to call up a pizza for ya? *dial dial dial*

Nick : *whispers* Who the fuck is this guy?

Lana : Once again, how the fuck should I know? And now for our sponsers!

Keiko : Head on! Apply directly to forehe-*gets whacked on the forehead with a wooden plank*

Matt : That was quick... I didn't even get through to hi-Oh, yeah, I'd like a...*talks on phone*

Lotta Hart : Hey! What about my hardly sports-related gossip slot?

Lana : What about it?

Godot : Caffine rush! *starts to dance on the table, singing an awful 80's song in a high voice*

Ini Mimi : That is, like, such an awsome tune and, like I totally should join in! *begins to waltz with Godot*

Lotta Hart : The pay had better be worth it..

Minuki : It is...

Image : Or else!

Marshall : Fuck off, Engarde! You don't work here! Wait a minute... didn't you die from gravy saturation yesterday?

Matt : Oh yeah... *crumples into heap*

Godot Marshall : That's hot!

Lotta Hart : Man, I wish I could make people die by saying things.

Marshall Godot : ...

Lotta Hart : Umm... I think I'll come back on the next part! *She runs away as the Benny Hill theme plays*

Lana : I had no idea you played the trumpet Minuki... And now to Mr Gumshoe with the latest movie review.

Image : 300 sort of turned me on!

Lana : And now to Mr Wri-

Image : It made me do the Popcorn Trick with myself!

Lana : And now to Mr Wright with his bullshit...

Nick : Thanks Lana, you dirty tramp.

Ini Mimi : Oh no he didn't!

Nick : The chicken or the egg... Which tastes better?

Godot : Everything tastes great with coffee, bitch!

Nick : Shut the fuck up!

Spit : Image

Accordion head : Image

Godot : Dammit, CI! Not you again!

Yuusaku : Catch me if you can, asshole!

*insert epic chase with drugs, explosions and sexual material*

Nick : What the-

ImageImage : *brings out guns* This is a hold up!

[right]To be continued...

ImageImage : *brings out guns* This is a hold up!

Lana : Oh Lord...

Ack : Maya? WTF?!

Maya Fey : Quiet! Our demands are to be followed...

Edgeworth Maya Fey : We want these smileys to be accepted!

Smiley A -Image
Smiley b -Image

Image : If these aren't posted, we will shoot one person in the studio every hour on the.-


POOF

Lana : What the...

Minuki : Magic.

Lana : But..


Image : Magic!

Gant : *breaks in* Fresh rapes!

Wacky Edgy : OHGODHELPMAYADOSOMETHINGZOMG!

Maya Fey : It's O.K. I'm prepared for this situation... *throws a Minuki doll over Damon Gant's shoulder*

Maya Shock : Oh my god, Gant! Look, it's a fresh rape for the picking! Fetch!

Damon : Nice try, but even I know the difference between a doll and true rapes! *gets closer to Maya*

Image : Hold it!

Edgeworth : Mr Gant, you do realize that Maya is a girl, right?

Damon : She is? Damn it.

Maya Shock : What the fuck!? How do I look like a guy!?

Yuusaku : *enters* Join the club! *leaves*

Damon : Wait a moment, Edgey. What about you? *looms over to Edgeworth*

Wacky Edgy : I... Uh... I'm a girl too!

Gant : Oh really?

Edgeworth : ...

Edgy : ...You mean you couldn't tell?

Damon : Damn it!. Fine, you're free to go....

Damon : Oh well...

Gant : Oh yes! I've found a Macaulay Culkin doll! *insert Wizard of Oz theme music*

Nick : That's a pretty odd , don't you-


Image : *uses magic shield*

Image : We're in a protective shield! Thanks, Minuki!

Marshall : A protective shield, just like a co-

Lana : Stop it, Mr Marshall.

Maya Shock : Gant! Help us!

Gant : Are you kidding? I'm too busy with taking the doll's virginity!


Image : I have nothing to live for now...

Image : Why does this happen to meeeeeeeeee?!

Lana : ....

Image : We're back on Channel 6: Turnabout News!

Maggy : Welcome back. Today's top story tonight; Edgeworth is a girl. the local police chief claims to have proof of these claims.

Phoenix : I feel sorry for Edgeworth... God, I love being a guy!

Maggy : This just in: Police Chief Damon Gant says that Phoenix Wright is a liar, and he has conclusive evidence to prove it. Care to fill us in, Gant?

Damon : Image This is a copy of Phoenix Wright's sex change operation report, where he changed from a girl to a guy. see, it says it right down there. *points*

Ack : Damnit, I thought I've destroyed all of that evidence!

Yuusaku : *enters* Join the club! *leaves*

Lana : ...Okay. And now over to Godot with his Coffee News.

Marshall : Darn it, he's not here...

Image : Are you serious?

Marshall : Well, all he left was this odd mug...

Image

Lana : ...That coffee-nut should be put out of his misery.

Damon : I con-

Lana : Don't talk.

Lotta Hart : Howdy Folks! And now for Sports Gossip! This time it's about Will Powers. He's just broken the world record for the 100 meters! He was reported as saying:

Will Powers : ARGH! Get this tiger away from me!

Sob : Regant! Come back!

Lana : Whatever... And now over to Mr Gumshoe with his latest movie reviews...


Gymshoe : Gee! Godot, thanks for the coffee! Wow! Whee! I feel great like sooo great! What kind of stuff is in this!? I've never had coffee like this before! Whoooo! Exhiliarating and geez, what a kick! WOW! I feel-

Lana : He's a bit-

Image : Spider-Man 3's a Sony whore!

Lana : Uh-

Image : It also gave me a nocturnal emission!

Maggy : Oooooh! Big words!

Gymshoe : Thanks!

Lana : (Idiots...)

To be continued...


Last edited by RevFirst on Tue May 15, 2007 6:26 pm, edited 2 times in total.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Do you see the black one...or the white?

Gender: Male

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Lol! The people at the channel six forums are so random! Love all of ya'll! Keep up the funnies!
On April 3, 2016, Court Records Forums experienced a miracle upon that day.
CatMuto wrote:
Pierre wrote:
Man...that looks dull...this actually makes me worried for KH3 (since that team worked on the battle system)


I feel the same
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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BIKE MONEY!

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Thanks.
I'm just posting to say that the font-size is fixed.
So many codes!
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Do you see the black one...or the white?

Gender: Male

Location: IN SPACE!

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 12:06 pm

Posts: 6664

Lol! It must look like an encryption when its being typed up!
On April 3, 2016, Court Records Forums experienced a miracle upon that day.
CatMuto wrote:
Pierre wrote:
Man...that looks dull...this actually makes me worried for KH3 (since that team worked on the battle system)


I feel the same
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Fabu♥

Gender: Female

Location: Concrete jungle where dreams are made of

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Hey, eliasbloodmoon.
That fic sounds awfully familiar... Think
ImageImage
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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"Too Awesome to Die"

Gender: Male

Location: New Arcadia

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 3:01 pm

Posts: 712

LySs wrote:
Hey, eliasbloodmoon.
That fic sounds awfully familiar... Think

Yes. I like that one chapter so much.
By the way, like the new avi. It's shiny.
--------
Phoenix , Maya Fey ,and Edgy on vacation in Japan.
Maya Fey *Looks in store window* OH! LOOK! I WANT THAT!
Nick Gyakuten Saiban Four, eh. Sorry, but I'm out of money.
Edgeworth Me too.
Maya Fey Ah...But I'm out of money too.
Edgeworth Maybe you should get a temporary job while you're here.
Nick Come on. Since when has a job done anything for anybody cool?
--------
Von Karma SOOOOOOUUUUULS! I MUST HAVE SOULS!
Phoenix Excuse me, but I would like a coke.
Von Karma SOOOOOOUUUUULS!
Nick COOOOOKE!
Von Karma SOOOOOUUUUULS!
Nick COOOOOKE!
Von Karma Coke....
Phoenix Right. I would like to large and a...
Von Karma SOOOOUUUUUUULS!
Nick Screw this. I'm going to Burger King.
Child of Lida_Rose and Aliucon. Married to yuzikichan0! Father of Ha³ and Apollo72.
Image
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

That's one of my rules.

Gender: Male

Rank: Decisive Witness

Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2007 11:10 pm

Posts: 181

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Wolfy...

Gender: None specified

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Thu Apr 19, 2007 11:42 pm

Posts: 127

*Continuing on from Franizards Guilty*

Phoenix ...You know, I have a feeling that Mr. Manectric is about to create a series, then give up on it...

Edgeworth Nonsense, Wright. He doesn't even have a possesed smiley to use!

Garyuu *Cough cough*

Ack Edgeworth *...Both slowly turn around, and see*

Ack ...WE're screwed now.

Garyuu Yep! Phoenix Wright, In Sinnoh, will be brought to you in a moment! But first, a word from our sponser.


Pearl *Clears throat* Mr. Manectric has asked me to come out here and tell you that this sponser is funnied by-

Maya Fey Uh, Pearl, swap that around...

Pearl Oh, thank you Mystic Maya! This funny is sponsered by Pokemon Diamond and Pearl! Now, our feature presentation!

*Backstage*

Garyuu Good job out there, Pearls! Just one slip up!

Pearl I know! Can I have that cookie now?

Garyuu ...No.




*We see Maya, Phoenix and Edgeworth on a country road, standing around blankly, all now wearing the outfits of Pokemon trainers*

Phoenix ...You look nice with that Hat, Edgeworth!

Edgeworth Shut up, Wright.

*WILD Detective Gumshoe APPEARED!*

Detective Gumshoe Hey, uh, Pal, I kinda got lost on the way to my hotel, can you-

OBJECT! POKEBALL GO!

Eh? Wh-*Captured, goes into Pokeball, which then dings silently.*

Wacky Edgy WRIGHT, YOU IDIOT! YOU JUST STUFFED A DETECTIVE INTO A BALL THE SIZE OF AN ORANGE!

Phoenix *checks stats* ...And he's only at level 5...

Maggy Hey, Gumshoe, where are you? I got directions to the hotel-

:-p POKEBALL GO!

Maggy What the he-*Ka-Captured*

Maya Fey Yay! I caught Maggey!

Wacky Edgy STOP RIGHT THERE! YOU TWO WILL NOT GO AROUND CAPTURING LAW ENFORCEMENT!

Will Powers Hey, Mr. Wri-

Edgy POKBALL GO!

Will Powers Huh-*Captured*

Nick ...

Edgeworth I said the Law enforcement, I never said anything about actors...

Nick You sicken me.
If I could walk the Moonlit Night
Free of all human stress and fright...
If I could Howl my own Wolf Song
If I could right my Every Wrong...
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

clueless

Gender: None specified

Rank: Suspect

Joined: Mon Apr 30, 2007 1:29 am

Posts: 31

(what's up with the recent pokemon posts?)
Hobohodo my pokemon hat is so cool
Edgeworth I wish I had a hat
---later---
Ack s---! look what i accidentally caught!!(:hotti:) that's the suckiest pokemon ever!
:edgey: well look! I caught two extra rares!(:shoe:)(:missle:)
Nick they actually look like pokemon, man this sucks, maybe i need better pokeballs
Maya Fey sweet! i have the first two complete sets of killin' pokemon, ( Foam ) ( Redd White ) ( Devasque ) ( Karma Scream ) ( Damon )--( Beef )( Ini Mimi ) ( Acro )( That's Gotta Hurt )
Edgeworth they don't seem very happy...
( this was a bad post, but what they hay....)
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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BIKE MONEY!

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Posts: 957

dullahan1 wrote:
Lol! It must look like an encryption when its being typed up!

Yes and it will only get worse! Accordion head

Actually, I have a new joke/idea but I'm not sure what medium I should put it as. Eh?
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

In charge of confetti

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Rank: Suspect

Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 3:35 pm

Posts: 16

eliasbloodmoon wrote:
LySs wrote:
Hey, eliasbloodmoon.
That fic sounds awfully familiar... Think

Yes. I like that one chapter so much.
By the way, like the new avi. It's shiny.
--------
Phoenix , Maya Fey ,and Edgy on vacation in Japan.
Maya Fey *Looks in store window* OH! LOOK! I WANT THAT!
Nick Gyakuten Saiban Four, eh. Sorry, but I'm out of money.
Edgeworth Me too.
Maya Fey Ah...But I'm out of money too.
Edgeworth Maybe you should get a temporary job while you're here.
Nick Come on. Since when has a job done anything for anybody cool?
--------
Von Karma SOOOOOOUUUUULS! I MUST HAVE SOULS!
Phoenix Excuse me, but I would like a coke.
Von Karma SOOOOOOUUUUULS!
Nick COOOOOKE!
Von Karma SOOOOOUUUUULS!
Nick COOOOOKE!
Von Karma Coke....
Phoenix Right. I would like to large and a...
Von Karma SOOOOUUUUUUULS!
Nick Screw this. I'm going to Burger King.

Decline of video games
nice
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

In charge of confetti

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sorry posted twice

Last edited by LockeRomero on Tue May 22, 2007 8:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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BIKE MONEY!

Gender: Male

Rank: Prosecutor

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Posts: 957

Wellington : It's now time for a very, very serious documentary show...
Image

Wellington : I've been assigned to know more about Damon Gant's new organization, F.U.C.K. Just don't call it a cult!

Welly : They have fought many battles to keep their secrets off the meda, now they are using it to attack Channel Six: Turnabout News into them. However, my investigation has been criticised by the same news station. Here's a quote from one of its members:

Phoenix : If you are interested in becoming a TV journalist, Beef Wellington is a fine example of how not to do it. He freaking looks like Prince Rogers Nelson... It makes me cringe.

Lana : Says the guy who married an 8-year old.

Ack : Shut the fuck up!

Wellington : F.U.C.K. has two faces - nice and smiley, and sinisterly rape-ish. To prove my point, Damon Gant has showed me his albums containing hideous images of people getting raped. Ironically or not, it was in the "Kiddy-Fiddling" section of the albums that I lost it.

Welly : This is the moment of when the argument took off:

Gant : Don't ever say F.U.C.K. is a cult! It's just a party!

Beef : You sick mother-fucking piece of shit!

Gant : Kiddy-fiddling was benifit to mankind in the 40's!

Beef : How can you tell!? You were not there!

Damon : But-

Beef : You were not there!...

Wellington : Are you listening to me?

Damon : But-

Beef : Yoooou weeeeere noooooot theeeeeeere!...

Welly : After that, F.U.C.K. has prepared an attack video, and they have shown the F.U.C.K vs the Beef Wellington shouting match to anyone who would watch it. There is talk of 100,000 copies being released with bonus Michal Jackson Kiddie-Fiddling extras.

Wellington : And that's not all. Strangers have now called on my neighbours, my mother's house and someone spied on my brother's wedding and fled the moment he was challenged. And the worst part is that Damon Gant is always next to me when I take a dump....

Damon : Oh... That one's a big chocolate banana...

Beef : Back to you, Ms Skye!

(Authors note: Not really funny but I was so tempted to do this.)
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

That's one of my rules.

Gender: Male

Rank: Decisive Witness

Joined: Fri Mar 02, 2007 11:10 pm

Posts: 181

You will see this on all of my posts. I used this account when I was 13-14 and some of the content I am not happy about. I am sorry to anyone who read my posts and was rightfully offended by any of it. I will likely not use this website again, just FYI.

Last edited by Wizard Anon on Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Lady Luckless

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Wacky Edgy Earth... quake? *whimpers in corner*
Wendy Oldbag Edgey-poo, I'll save you!
Wacky Edgy *sniffle, sniffle* O SHT
Yani Fist MILES EDGEWORTH! I HATE YOU!
Moe Laugh Aha! Aha! Aha! I don't know what's going on! Aha! Aha! Aha!
Accordion head BUY MY STUFF!
"Show me an innocent... I'll show you a fairy tale."
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

clueless

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Posts: 31

Pearl Mr. Nick, how do you get your hair so spikey?
Phoenix I put gel in it and then I stick my head in a wind tunnel so it gets blown back
Pearl I wanna try that
<Insert funny pic of pearl being blown away with bad hairdo>
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

clueless

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Rank: Suspect

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Posts: 31

oops, I double posted that one. hmm you cant delete posts only edit them.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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"Too Awesome to Die"

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Edgeworth (nine years old) No, my father is dead!
Von Karma And your mother is non-existant, so I'll be taking you in and forcing you to become a prosecutor!
Edgeworth WHAT!
Taser And I like to tazer imperfection, and since you aren't directly of my bloodline, you're imperfect!
Edgeworth OW!
Von Karma Now, to meet your new sister! She likes to whip people!
Ka-Whip Hello, older brother.
Edgeworth OW! I hate my life! *runs into the bathroom and starts cutting himself*
----present day----
Edgy And that's how I became an emo!
Nick Riiiiiiiight....
Child of Lida_Rose and Aliucon. Married to yuzikichan0! Father of Ha³ and Apollo72.
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Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

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Cookie and an internet if you can tell what I'm spoofing.

Edgeworth : Oh now, Godot, what the hell, have you just been sitting on your pruney keister all day, reading the paper?

Godot : Heavens, no! I also went downstairs to get a cup of coffee.

Edgeworth : (Sits Down) Well, it must be nice not having everyone want a piece of you. If one more person interrupts my me-time, I'm gonna go ahead and get a tattoo of my hand giving the middle finger on the back of my head.

Godot : Well, why not? It's not as though it could make you look any more like a psychopath.

Edgeworth : Well, whatever it takes for them to leave me alone.

Godot : (Drinks his coffee) ... You love it.

Edgeworth : (Confused) How's that?

Godot : Being everybody's go-to guy. Edgeworth, people do not do things over and over unless they get some kind of joy out of it. I've been watching you for twenty years, champ. Your joy comes from being needed. That's who you are.

Edgeworth : (Stunned)...

--------------------

Detective Gumshoe : Maybe being deaf was the biggest connection he and his son had. You know, when I was a kid, I made my dad teach me sign language so that I could communicate with my deaf sister. I ended up closer to her than with anyone. Maybe he is afraid of losing that.

Phoenix : Is any of that true?

Detective Gumshoe : Mostly. My dad died before I was born.

Phoenix : Wait a minute! I met your dad!

Detective Gumshoe : You met a man.

-------------------------

Maya Fey : What's up your kaboodle?

Franziska : Kaboodle?

Maya Fey : It's a new word I'm trying out to replace "ass". I have loose morals, and am living a life of sin, so I'm hoping that not being a potty-mouth will get me into heaven.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Science: It's cuter than ever

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Orcaizer Al's funnies are epic.
Gant and Karma talking in jail was pure genius.
HIDE YOUR KIDDIES.
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Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
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Chinese Infantry presents (in addition to several shameless advertisements):

Image


:wellington: *Sigh* I'm not going to say anything. Just give the damn location.

*Location: Berry Big Circus*

:acro: Hello, kiddies, I'm Ken Dingling, but you know me better as Acro. You also know I have a little brother named Bat, AKA, Sean Dingling. But what you didn't know is I have another brother, who was also an acrobat until he broke his wrist in an alone time accident. His name is Ic, which completes our name: AcroBatIc. His real name is Harry Dingling.

*Insert Canned Laughter here*

:yuusaku: Now that I got that random, unfunny joke off my chest, here is the real location.

*Location: Outside Adrian's House*

:jake: Finally, back to the helicopter to go to the next...WAITWHERETHEFUCKISTHEHELICOPTER?

:wellington: Well, at least you know where it isn't...

:texasman: This is all your fault, Beef! You told me to park in the middle of the road, telling me "Ohh, a helicopter is too big to tow!" and look! IT'S FUCKING TOWED!

:wellington: Well, you were stupid enough to actually listen to my advice. You were supposed to ignore me and find a better spot!

:marhsal: But you....uggghhh...Now we are stranded. We are stuck here until we can hitch a ride.

:wellington: I have a better idea *stands in road. Car stops in front of him*

:sawit-mad: MOVE, ASSHOLE!

:wellington: Sorry, good sir, but I need to borrow your ride *pulls Sawhit out of car*

:marhsal: *Sigh* the classic GTA style of jacking cars?

:wellington: You bet!

:hair-bounce: NOT IF I CAN HELP IT *Insert toupee throw here*

:beef: Hey, that wasn't cool *pulls out a glock* SUCK ON MY NINE, BITCH! *Caps Sawhit*

:texasman: Was that really necesary?

:wellington: He threw a toupee at me. You would have shot him too, bitch!

WANTED LEVEL: **

:beef: WHAT! HOW DID I GET A 2 STAR WANTED LEVEL JUST FROM THAT?

:marhsal: Yeah, when you kill someone, the cops usually want to get you. Now get in the car and lets get out of here!

*Location on the road*

:texasman: You see! Two seconds on the road, and a cop is already behind us. Just pull over, it isn't worth it.

:wellington: No way, I'll just enter in a little cheat I learned in order to erase my wanted level...

WANTED LEVEL: ******

:beef: Crap, that wasn't it.

:texasman: Now look what you've done. You've made it even worse.

:wellington: Well, it's not like a whole platoon of U.S. Army tanks can appear surrounding me in a matter of seconds...

*Insert platoon of tanks rolling in from all directions here*

:beef: OK! NOW THIS IS RIDICULOUS! *Stops car* HOW IS IT POSSIBLE FOR EVEN ONE, LET ALONE A BUNCH OF TANKS KNOW TO FIND A PERSON AT THIS PRECISE LOCATION AND ROLL FROM A MILITARY BASE AT LEAST 50 FREAKING MILES AWAY AND HERE IN AN MATTER OF TWO SECONDS! IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE, AND...*Insert tank blasts here*

WASTED!


*Location: Outside a hospital*

When you run out of health, you will be transported to the nearest hospital, where your wounds will be treated. Before being discharged, hospital staff will confiscate your weapons and charge...

:beef: I DON'T CARE! I DON'T EVEN HAVE ANY WEAPONS!

:marhsal: What about the glock that started this whole mess...

:beef: Ohh yeah...

:texasman: Well, Mr. Freelance Photojournalist, any more bright ideas?

:yuusaku: Yeah, because if you don't, I want to go back to my other show...

:welly: I got it! I just figured out the most genius way to now only get all the scoops we need, but find Phoenix and Maya as well.

:marhsal: Well, it can't be any worse than your other ideas...

:welly: We go to a filming of the show and then interview the cast after. They were all at the wedding, they'll surely have some juicy info. Sometimes, I think I'm a genius...

:marhsal: (Which is why you got my helicopter towed, hijacked a car, shot the owner and got the U.S. Military to blast us with tank shells)

:beef: I HEARD THAT! JACKASS!

:marhsal: But it was...

:wellington: No no no, thought text is cyan, not green.

:marhsal: Dammit!

:wellington: Can you whisk us to the show?

:yuusaku: I guess. But first, the commercial.

*Lights dim*

Coming this fall...

:judge: Court is now in session for the trial of Harry Dingling.

:edgeworth: The prosecution is ready your honor.

:phoenix: The defense is also...ready your honor.

A defense attorney and a prosecutor are rivals in court.

:phoenix: So...I won the case. No hard feelings, I guess.

:edgeworth: Yeah. Say, want to go out for a coffee.

:phoenix: Sure, why not.

But over time, even bitter rivals can learn to love each other.

:yuusaku: And in Yaoi, it always happens, because we all know the more two males hate each other, the more they are in love...

CI! GET OUT OF THIS PREVIEW! Ahem, where was I. Ohh yes, they learn the love each other.

*The two are in bed with each other*

:phoenix: I love you Miles.

:edgeworth: Ssshhh, don't speak those words, what if they find out?

:phoenix: No one will ever have to know.

*Scene cut*

:maya: Nick? You've been acting strange around that prosecutor lately. Is everything ok?

:nick: Yeah, yeah, everything is fine.

Because love is a force of nature.

:yuusaku: And a force of a fangirl's whims.

Seriously, if you don't shut up...

:yuusaku: You can't stop me! I'm the author!

Well, can you at least let me finish?

:yuusaku: ...Whatever...

Now let's see. Their love will meet many obstacles.

:edgeworth: This case is impossible. I guess a guilty verdict for me is inevitable.

:object: Grr...I WISH I KNEW HOW TO ACQUIT YOU!

But come to an untimely end.

:udgy: Where is the defendant?

:meekins: There was a note in his cell. He had hung himself and left the note: "Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth chooses death."

:ack: Nooo....

Phoenix and Miles Vanderworth star in...

Brokeback Turnabout
A touching tale of love (plus you will be labeled a homophobe if you do not see it)


Rated PG-13!

*End commercial*

And now, our feature presentation!

Chinese Infantry presents (in addition to previously said advertisements and the show above):

FOUR GUYS (AND ONE FREEBALLER) NAKED IN A HOT TUB!
No, we did not rehearse this...


Group members tonight are:
( :wellington: ) Beef Wellington, a newcomer to the group.

( :damon: ) Damon Gant, that fucking child molester.

( :godot: ) Godot, still a pimp.

( :eh?: ) Dick Gumshoe, if only he had a brain...

and in Phoenix's abscene, tonight's acting group moderator:

( :edgy: ) MILES EDGEWORTH!

:edgeworth: Good evening. Because Phoenix and Maya Wright are both on their honeymoon, I will be filling in, because others of us are either fucked up...

:gant: I LIKE TOUCHING CHILDRENS!

:edgeworth: Extreme smartasses...

:godot: Who you callin' a smartass, bitch?

:edgeworth: Or just plain stupid...

:eh?: Huh?

:edgeworth: Whatever, let's just get this over with. Issue number 1: The Phoenix/Godot pairing. Though slightly better since it doesn't involve me, I think it is even more unlikely than Me/Wright, on account that the two hate each other. The question tonight: does this pairing make any sense, or is it just another goddamn rival Yaoi pairing. I will start off with our newcomer: Beef Wellington.

:wellington: First of all, it's Richard Wellington, Freelance Photojournalist...

:edgeworth: Yeah, well, I'm hungry, so I'm calling you beef.

:wellington: Secondly, when I agreed to go to an airing of this show, I did not think I was actually going to be on the show.

:edgeworth: Yeah, well someone had to fill in for me, so you were perfect. Now answer the question before I have Gant touch you.

:beef: Ok ok. From your description, the pairing is illogical.

:edgeworth: Ok, Mr. Spock, thank you. Gant, give us your opinion.

:gant: ...ALL YAOI PAIRINGS ARE GOOD. ANYONE WHO HATES THIS PAIRING IS A GRADE-A HOMOPHOBE!

:edgeworth: Or, they have more common sense than to pair enemies. Now let's go to Godot, who has been surprisingly quiet.

:godot: Ohh, I was just building up energy for my rant, bitch...

:edgeworth: ...Great......

:godot: ...OK, WHO THE FUCK'S IDEA WAS IT TO PAIR ME UP WITH THAT EDGEWORTHFUCKER MARUHODOU, ESPECIALLY AFTER WHAT HE DID TO MIA! I'M PROBABLY THE STRAIGHTEST CHARACTER IN THE SERIES, I DON'T HAVE ANY EFFEMINATE/FLAMBOUYANT TRAITS AND YET, I STILL END UP IN A YAOI PAIRING. I SWEAR, I'M FUCKING GOING TO HAVE TO CHOKE A BITCH! FUCKING FUCKED-UP FUCKERS FUCKING FUCKED FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUUUUUUUCK!!!!*Visor explodes*

:edgeworth: ...and let this be a lesson to you kiddies. Don't swear too much or bad things happen. Gumshoe?

:gumshoe: ...is there a movie involved?

:edgeworth: Uhh...no?

:sadshoe: Then I've got nothin'...

:edgeworth: Like usual. Ok, Issue number 2: the release of TAT in the states. Not to almost be confused with the fake Russian lesbian duet...

:spit: WHAT? TATU WAS FAKE? GODDAMMIT, I'M OUT OF $50 BUCKS, BITCH!

:edgeworth: ...once the game is released in the states, people will be able to play the game again, but this time in English so they can read it without translation guides or knowing Japanese. Also, CI will be throwing a huge fucking party, which will drain his money because he is also throwing a party celebrating the release of Halo 3. Later on, he also plans to throw a party celebrating the release of Half-Life 2: Episode as well as Team Fortress 2 and Portal, assuming they don't get DELAYED again.

:yuusaku: This is another reason to BUY MY STUFF! If I have the money, the parties I throw won't suck. Plus, you'll be invited!

:edgeworth: ...any ideas, besides bald pitches for money? Beef, you go first.

:wellington: I say you first rent out a really exclusive hotel. Then you invite thousands of guests, including, but not limited too: Celebrities, Court Records Members, Friends, Family, Heroes from the Elysian Fields, Spartan Soldiers, both kinds of course, Actors, Rap Stars, Croik and the spirit of Biggie Smalls. Then you set up the party in an elaborate fashion, with a giant dance, fountains of punch and at Midnight, wheel out a giant cake...shaped like MILES EDGEWORTH'S CAR.

:yuusaku: Not only was that all already done on an episode of South Park, but I do not have that kind of money. In order to make it, not only would everyone have to buy my stuff but I'd have to whore myself out to each and every Court Records member for *does math* $31,225,605.00 a piece.

:wacky-edgy: Say whaaaa?

:yuusaku: Actually, it's to $31,225,604.996096799375487900078064, but I rounded up for simplicity. Plus if we get new members in between, I won't have to charge as much...

:wacky-edgy: That's not the point. Wellington, your idea is too expensive, already done, and unrealistic. Gant, please tell me you have a better idea.

:gant: I SAY WE GET ALL THE MALE FANS AND HAVE ONE MASSIVE ORGY!

:edgeworth: (Silly me, I forgot asking Gant for a good idea is like asking Funk for Phoenix/Maya fanfiction...) Yeah, you do that. Godot, hopefully you aren't a complete dumbass...

:godot: Of course I ain't, bitch! First, we get all the female fans and have a wet t-shirt contest between them, which they then proceed to get naked and dance like strippers. Then, in honor of my debut, we shall serve various blends of coffee from all around the world in special mugs for each guest. Then at midnight, we will unveil a life-size statue of Maruhodou and Edgeworth making out!

:edgeworth: Godot, please poison your own coffee and kill yourself drinking it. Gumshoe, I'm not going to even bother with you...

:gymshoe: But I had a great idea, pal! We could get some of those paper birthday hats, and those blowy thingys that make noise, bake a cake saying "Happy Third Birthday Phoenix Wright!" and blow up a bunch of baloons.

:edgeworth: ...Because you would only miss the point. (Horribly.) Now, Issue number three: the Rap Music.

:yuusaku: *Eye widens*

:gant: WHICH GIVES KIDS THE BRAIN DAMAGE!

:edgeworth: Shut up!

:gant: YOU SEE, WHEN THEY'RE HIPPIN' AND THE HOPPIN...

:wellington: Shut up!

:gant: AND THE BIPPIN' AND THE BOPPIN', SO THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT THE JAZZ IS ALL ABOUT...

:godot: Shut up, bitch!

:gant: JAZZ IS LIKE, JELLO PUDDING. NO! ACTUALLY IT'S MORE LIKE KODAK FILM!

:sadshoe: Be quiet, pal!

:gant: NO, ACTUALLY JAZZ IS LIKE THE NEW COKE, IT'LL BE AROUND FOREVER, HEH HEH HEH...

:wacky-edgy: :beef: :spit: :sadshoe: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

:damon: ...

:edgeworth: Good. Now then, the Rap Music. Some people like it, others despise it. Question is: is it actual music or just some guy talking to a beat. Beefy, you are first.

:wellington: Call me Beef again, and I'll cap you...

:edgeworth: What, so the U.S. Military can blast your ass again...

:wellington: Whatever. Anyways, I'm too much of a sophisticated Freelancer to even listen to ruffian music such as rap. It's all about the classics with me. That, and listen to the occasionaly Alternative Rock CD or two...

:yuusaku: Nnnrrrggghhh...

:edgeworth: Good for you, Mr. Stuck Up. Gant, you aren't allowed to go because you wouldn't shut up before.

:gant: BUT WHY NOT. CAN'T I SHOW OFF MY HOT EMINEM/DR. DRE/50 CENT THREESOME ART I MADE...

:wacky-edgy: WHAT THE? I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS EVEN POSSIBLE TO SHIP RAPPERS!

:godot: Well, actually, I ship Ludacris/Missy Elliot, bitch!

:edgeworth: What, just because they did that one song together?

:godot: ...yeah......

:edgeworth: Speaking of you, what are your thoughts on Rap?

:godot: It's the playa's cup of coffee, bitch! I'm willing to bet half the people who hate it only do so because they want to jump on the bandwagon, saying "LOL, I HATE RAP! I LISTEN TO GUNS AND ROSES AND LED ZEPPLIN!* MY TASTE IN MUSIC IS BETTER THAN YOURS, BITCH!" well, you know what, LISTEN TO YOUR OWN DAMN MUSIC AND LET ME LISTEN TO MINE, BITCH!

*(Author's note: No offense to anyone who like those bands. I'm not dissing either of them...)

:edgeworth: At least I don't feel like killing you as much now.

:yuusaku: MMMMMPPPPPGGGGHHHH!

:edgeworth: What is it, CI?

:accordion-head: Can't take it anymore. My shit's so hot right now and it's about to BUST!

*Insert White Guy rapping here*

:edgeworth: ...

:wellington: ...

:damon: ...

:godot: ...

:eh?: ...What?

:yuusaku: Why did everyone suddenly go silent.

:wacky-edgy: WRIGHT! WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME WITH THIS JOB!

Image What did I do?

:edgeworth: Excuse me, but is your last name Wright?

Image As a matter of fact it is. Eric Lynn Wright, but you probably know me as Eazy-E!

:wacky-edgy: Wait, didn't you die of AIDS?

Image Yeah, I did, but a certain white boy thought it would be funny to summon me by saying my name three times in front of a mirror...

:edgeworth: Speaking of white boy, did you listen to that crap.

Image Yeah, and all I can say to you is: Don't quit ya day job.

:yuusaku: But I don't have a day job.

Image Then get one, because you sure as hell ain't goin' to make any money wit' that wack-ass shit!

:edgeworth: Which sums up my opinions about that as well. Gumshoe, your thoughts on rap.

Image 8 Mile GAVE ME A RAGING ERECTION! ALSO, WHEN I HEARD AKON'S NEW SINGLE, I BLEW MY LOAD!

:edgeworth: That's lovely. Now we are both out of time and I am out of sanity...

:beef: Waaaaait! At least tell me where Phoenix and Maya went on their honeymoon.

:edgeworth: I dunno, somewhere in Japan. I don't know where though....

:wellington: That's all I needed to know...

:edgeworth: Coming up next episode, assuming Phoenix Wright returns, we will venture into even more fascinating topics that will possibly scar you for life, kind of like Gant's suggestion for celebrating the release of Trials and Tribulations. MEETING FUCKING ADJOURNED!
I yell "OBJECTION!" in the court sometimes!


Last edited by Chinese Infantry on Fri Jul 20, 2007 2:09 am, edited 2 times in total.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
User avatar

Do you see the black one...or the white?

Gender: Male

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Posts: 6664

Genius CI!!! I just love reading each new funny you put up and it cracks me up every single time!!!! Very very well done!!! Your Gant, as creepy as he is, always cracks me up!!! Looking forward to seeing the rest of this!!!
On April 3, 2016, Court Records Forums experienced a miracle upon that day.
CatMuto wrote:
Pierre wrote:
Man...that looks dull...this actually makes me worried for KH3 (since that team worked on the battle system)


I feel the same
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

Yaoi Queen

Gender: Female

Location: Canada, yay!

Rank: Decisive Witness

Joined: Sun Apr 22, 2007 4:50 am

Posts: 183

LOL!!! CL!!! Awesome like always. You've just sparked my Phoenix/Godot obsession! *goes to doodle yaoi*
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title

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Location: Pennsylvaina

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Joined: Sat May 19, 2007 11:43 am

Posts: 380

Heh people didn't seem to know what I was parodying I guess. Well here's another one. I'm still waiting for people to guess it. Edgy

Phoenix Thing is I don't really need a buddy... What I need is a father

Edgeworth Well you definately need something. Um... Maybe a backbone, or perhaps some testicals. At the very least a pillow you could carry around the courthouse and just cry your sad eyes out.
Re: Phoenix Wright FunniesTopic%20Title
User avatar

Science: It's cuter than ever

Gender: Female

Location: Michigan

Rank: Prosecutor

Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2007 3:25 am

Posts: 999

Chinese Infantry wrote:
OBJECT! Grr...I WISH I KNEW HOW TO ACQUIT YOU!


OH MY GOD I LAUGHED SO HARD Gant
Image
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