Built For The Kill
Gender: Male
Location: Massachussetts
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Wed Feb 28, 2007 9:24 am
Posts: 1559
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...*Crawling... Music playing...*
EPISODE WTF: GYAKUTEN SAIBAN CHARACTER GRAND PRIX!!!Confusion strikes Obi Wan and the Gyakuten Gang yet again! Naruhodou,
Odoroki, Chihiro (Who is now acting like an arse over Kaminogi Souryuu's death), Kyle, and Derek are
being chased by an AT-ST, Mitsurugi stupidly ignited his lightsaber and ended up getting challenged
by Darth Maul and... Anakin Skywalker has challenged Obi Wan... by Darth Vader's orders! Why the
bloody hell are Anakin and Vader separate people?! And what was that last bit about the Badger Droids and the trash for...?
...
Onboard Star Destroyer One, Inner Chamber B-1:
Anakin! What... WHY ARE YOU AND VADER SEPARATE PEOPLE?!

Why, is that a crime against the Jedi Council, Obi Wan?

Obi Wan! We should get outta here right now! Anakin might—

Too late!
*Anakin charges at Obi Wan with his lightsaber... but Obi Wan blocks just in time!*

Tell me! Why are you doing this?!

I'm not going to waste my time talking when I can just... kill you!
*Obi Wan jumps up to avoid Anakin's spinning lightsaber helicopter blade attack! Anakin jumps up as well and retrieves his lightsaber. Obi Wan and Anakin's lightsabers clash again!*

*Ignites lightsaber* Obi Wan! You need backup! Let me and Kyouya-kun help you!

Minuki-chan! Don't!
*Minuki leaps at Anakin and tries to hit him with her lightsaber!*

Don't interrupt the grown-ups, Magician Girl!
*Anakin Force Grips Minuki!*
MINUKI-CHAN!!! ANAKIN, YOU BASTARD!!!*Kyouya charges his Plasma Pistol and fires at Anakin!*

*Hit* Argh! What the...?

FOCUS, ANAKIN! HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN YOUR TRAINING?!
*Obi Wan leaps at Anakin again, but he blocks! Their lightsabers clash again, and both use Force Push at the same time... resulting in Obi Wan and Anakin to fall backwards and crash onto the metal walls!*

Mr. Jedi! Look out!
*Anakin gets up and uses Force Pull on the ceiling... and it crashes down on Obi Wan!*
AAAAARRRGGGGHH!!!
NO!!!
*Raises right arm* Looks like it was YOU, who has forgotten your training...
"Master".
*Anakin pulls gown the rest of the ceiling, attempting to crush everybody in the room!*

MINUKI! KYOUYA! HARUMI! GET OUT OF HERE AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!!

BUT—

Let's just do what he says, Minuki-chan! C'mon, let's go!
*Kyouya, Minuki, and Harumi attempt to escape, but Anakin uses a Force Pull technique on them!*

It would be rude to just run out!

D-DAMN IT!!!
*Anakin pushes the three onto a wall and chains them to it!*

Prepare to die!
NOOOOT OOOON YOOOOOOOUR LIIIIIIIIFE!!!*Mitsurugi hacks through the wall with his lightsaber and attacks Anakin!*

What the hell?!

&
M-MITSURUGI-SAN?!*Hobohodo, Akane, and Mayoi enter the room as well, carrying an unconscious Darth Maul.*

Sorry we're late, guys.

We had a bit of a handicap... Darth Maul ambushed us!

But Mitsurugi-kun was able to kick his ass and defeat Darth Maul-ttebayo!

&
HE DID?!
THAT'S RIGHT-TTEBAYO!!! LOOK AT MAUL'S FACE RIGHT NOW! HE TOTALLY GOT OWNED! DATTEBAYO!!!
Pain... So much pain...

&

...

Anyway, now that we're here... *Charges Plasma Pistol* You guys are free!
*Hobohodo fires at the chains holding Kyouya, Minuki, and Harumi and releases them! He releases Obi Wan from the metal ceiling as well! Everybody gangs up on Anakin with their blasters, Plasma Pistols, and lightsabers at the ready!*

*Raises lightsaber* It's eight against one, Anakin!

*Raises lightsaber* Why are you working for Darth Vader?!

Tell us or you'll get a mouthful of plasma!

Grr...

Do you surrender now, Anakin?

No... No... NO!!! THIS... THIS IS AN OUTRAGE! IT'S UNFAIR! YOU CAN'T CORNER ME LIKE THIS... I'M MORE POWERFUL THAN ANY OF YOU!!!

Oh really? Let's see!
*Mitsurugi uses a lightsaber helicopter blade attack on Anakin and chops off his left arm!*
MITSURUGI?!
GRAAAAAARRRGGGHHH!!!!
*Anakin yells in pain... When Akane notices something...*

Wait a minute... I thought Anakin's mechanical arm was his right one?

Then how come it's his left arm that looks fake?!

IT CAN'T BE?!

IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!
*The gang looks as "Anakin" dismantles! It was a droid all along!*
IT WAS JUST A DROID?! 
Hey... How come Ms. Science Lady isn't screaming in shock with us?
(Curse my lack of a shock smilie!) 
Could it be that she's a droid too, and is planning to kill us right now?!
(Say what?!)
Holy crap! Akane, you're a droid?!
(You too, Kyouya?!)
YOU'RE A DROID-TTEBAYO?! MAYOBUNSHIN NO JUTSU!!!
DIE, DROID, DIE!!!
(WTF?!)
She's not reacting at all! She IS a droid! Get her, Mayoi-chan!
(WHAT THE FUCK?! I'M NOT A DROID!!!)
A!!!
YA!!!
SA!!!
TO!!!
MAYUTO RENDAN!!!
I'M NOT A DROID, GODDAMMIT!!! CEASE THE ATTACK!!! BACK!!! BACK, I SAY!!! 
Hey, she's got a shock smilie now!

She's not a droid!

Mayoi! Stop the attack—
*Too late! Mayoi pummels Akane!*

That oughtta teach you droids to mess with us-ttebayo!

Pain... So much... pain...

Hey... How come she didn't dismantle like the Anakin droid?! Naruttebayo!!!

Uh... Mayoi? *Whispers something in Mayoi's ear*

...

...

... Oops.

Hey Akane! You okay?

At least I finally got a shock smilie...
*In one of the corners of the room, Darth Maul stirs...*

Mr. Redface is awake!

Good. Looks like we've got a chance to interrogate him now!
*Everyone begins to close in on Maul.*

Darth Maul...

What...?

We've got a few questions to ask you.
...
Onboard Star Destroyer One, Inner Chamber C-1:
AAACCKK!!!! THAT AT-ST IS STILL CHASING AFTER US!!!
*Fires lasers*
SHIT, IT'S A DEAD END!!!
SAY WHAT?!*The AT-ST closes in on Naruhodou, Odoroki, Chihiro, Kyle and Derek...*

...

No! I'm too young to die!!!

I'm too spikey to die!!!

I'm too passionately burning red to die!!!
BRADLEY-BOO!!!*The AT-ST gets ready to fire...*
HIYYAAAHH!!!*Chihiro jumps up and slashes at the AT-ST with her lightsaber! The AT-ST dismantles!*
NO WAI!!! 
*Deactivates lightsaber* Well that was just a nuisance!

A nuisance?! Sensei, it tried to kill us!

Yeah! A large Imperial Vehicle with a hell of a lot of firepower with the intent of blasting us all to space dust is hardly what I'd call "a nuisance", Chihiro-san!

But still! You've got lightsabers! Why didn't you use them?!

But...

No buts!
(Well, aren't we grumpy today, sensei...)
(Yeah, you got that right, Naruhodou-san!) 
... Are you two reading each other's minds?

Says who?

... Okaaay... So, now what? Now that the AT-ST's destroyed... What do we do?

We need to find the cells where Vader's keeping the prisoners!

Do you know where they are?

Eh... Actually, the two of us were kept in a maximum security cell.

That means we have no friggen idea where the other prisoners are.

We didn't even know that there were other prisoners!

Yeah, that damn Interrogation Droid can make you lose a few brain cells desu.

Oh, great! Now what do we do?

We have no choice but to keep moving on till we find the prisoners. Let's go!

But Chihiro-san! We just spent 30 minutes running from a deranged AT-ST! Can't we have a break?

No.

But—

I said "no"... Or didn't you hear me?

Aww, man!

All right, we're moving on! Looks like this chamber extends through that hallway over there!
(Why did sensei have to turn into suck an arse?)
(Isn't the answer obvious, Naruhodou-san?)
(... Oh yeah! THAT THING...) 
Am I the only one freaked out about those two being able to read each other's minds?!

Hey man, everything borders on the weird now. For all we know, Darth Vader could pull off a
Deus ex and make that AT-ST come back to life!

Kyle! Don't say things like that! It might come true!

Aww, come on, Derek!
YOU KNOW DEAD THINGS CAN'T COME BACK TO LIFE!...
Onboard Star Destroyer One, Control Room:*Darth Vader stares into space while his theme music plays...*

*Insert signature breathing here* Have you fulfilled your task yet?

Yes, Master. Obi Wan fell for the droid trap, and I was able to do what you told me to do while the others were distracted.

That's good...

However, I've got some bad news.

*Turns around* Bad news?

Yes, Master. It seems one of the Gyakuten Gang, Mitsurugi Reiji, has been able to defeat Darth Maul. He's been captured by Obi Wan's team.

Darth Maul was captured? By... Mitsurugi Reiji?

My apologies. His English name is Miles Edgeworth.

E-Edgeworth?!
MILES EDGEWORTH?! EDGEWORTH DEFEATED DARTH MAUL?!*Vader suddenly goes berserk!*

I-Is anything wrong, Master?

*Calms down* It's nothing... So Maul has been captured. That's not a good thing.

I know. That's why... I took your earlier suggestion and put some consideration in it.

My suggestion? You mean...

Yes, Master. My... new apprentice.

But he's dead!

Hehe. Dead? No. Grievous may have stabbed him with a lightsaber, but don't forget... I studied under Darth Sidious. I was able to learn the dark technique of ressurecting the dead. I have taken care of everything. My new apprentice is in a prison cell right now, and I shall be attending to him shortly.

Is that so...? I see. You have done well, Anakin.

Thank you, Master. *Evil grin*
...
Onboard Star Destroyer One, Prison Cell: 
Well, well, well...

Looks like the dipshit's awake.

Quite a surprise, really. Who knew he'd be able to survive that?

Hehe, definitely not me! But it must've been fun for him, swimming and all that...

Swimming in toxic waste because those numbskull droids thought he was a dead animal?

WHAT? At least he still went swimming!

Gant, you idiot! Sometimes I wonder why we're even cellmates!

Aww, don't be so grumpy! You know you're naturally attracted to me—

SHUT UP!!!

Oh yes! More!

WILL YOU JUST DIE ALREADY?!

Either that or I go into the kiddie pen and—
WHERE THE FRIGGEN HELL AM I?! 
...

...

Ah, so you're really awake now...

Surprise, surprise, eh? Welcome to our prison cell. You're our new cellmate!

I'm what? Grievous! Where's Grievous?!

HOH HOH HOH HOH HOH!!! GRIEVOUS? HE'S DEAD!!! *Claps*

Died in an explosion, no less!

So... If he's dead, then why the hell am I in a damn prison cell?!

Are you that stupid, boy?

... Or didn't you hear the news?

What news?

EVERYBODY THINKS YOU'RE DEAD!!! OHOHOHOHOHOHO!!! *Claps*
WHAT?! 
To be more specific, someone saw you get stabbed by Grievous's lightsaber, and left you to die!

And it was one of your comrades, too!
WHO THE BLOODY HELL IS THAT IDIOT WHO LEFT ME TO DIE?! 
Mia Fey!

Ayasato Chihiro!

Gant, you idiot! That's the same person!

I KNOW! HOH HOH HOH!!!

...

Hey... Why'd he suddenly become quiet?

I dunno, but since nobody's looking... I'm gonna sneak into the kiddie pen and—

IDIOT!!!

... It can't be...

Hmm? Looks like he's talking again!

... It's not true...

What the hell are you mumbling about?
IT'S... IMPOSSIBLE!!! 
Looks like he's moaning about something—

Alright, all you shitheads! Enough talk! You're making my "refreshing like a spring breeze" self get a headache!

Not HIM again...

Who is that retard?

Outoro. He's a prison guard. He thinks he's SOOOO awesome because of his "refreshing like a spring breeze" personality... but he's not!

Hey oldie! I heard that!
*Outoro approaches Gant.*

You don't have any right to talk about me like that!

And why not?

Hey, I wasn't talking to you! Either ways, I AM awesome. Hell, I heard one of the droids say that Vader promoted me to Storm Trooper! I'm so... eviler than you.

"Eviler"? That's bullshit!

You always make us laugh, Outoro!

Shut up! I AM eviler than you... Eviler than all of you!

... No, you're not.

Say what?

I said... "No, you're not"... Or didn't you hear me?

Line-stealer!

And what makes you say that, newbie?

... You know that taste you get in your mouth when you drink orange juice and then brush your teeth?

Augh, I hate that!

I LOVE IT!!!

WHAT?!

Do you like kittens?

... Y-Yeah...

I KICK THEM!!!

GASP!

And that gravy you're drinking...

N-NO!
I PISSED IN IT.
NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!*Outoro runs away.*

W-Whoa!

You scared away Outoro!

Hmph. He wasn't that hard to beat. Easily a real loser.
*Someone suddenly opens the cell doors!*

Ah... You're awake...

&

M-MASTER ANAKIN!!! *Bow down*

Don't waste your energy bowing down to me, fools! I'm not here to see you.

&

Y-YES, MASTER!!!
*Anakin approaches Souryuu.*

It must be a really bad feeling, isn't it? Grievous stabbed you in the stomach once, and people, nay, your own comrades, start spreading the word that you're dead...

...

And it must hurt more if that comrade was your own lover, correct?

... What the hell do you want?

First I'm going to ask you what YOU want. No. Don't bother answering. You want revenge, don't you?

Revenge?

That's right. You have hatred—

HEY, I HAVE HATRED, TOO!!!

Shut up, Sasuke! YOU LACK HATRED!!!

Grr...

Hey Sasuke... Are you over 18?

N-No...

OHOHOHOHOHO!!! Come with me to my office!

Gant, you idiot! Not while Master Anakin is here! Let's go!
*Gant, Karma, and Sasuke leave.*

A-Anyway... You... You have hatred! You have anger! I sense it in you... You want to unleash it, don't you? You want revenge more than anything! You've been betrayed by someone who's supposed to love you! How do you feel about that? ANGRY?!
YES!!!
Haha, that's just... perfect. Tell me your name!
K-KAMINOGI... SOURYUU...
Not anymore!
*Anakin extends his hand and performs Force Lightning!*

GAAAHH!!! WHAT ARE YOU...?!

From now on, you are...
DARTH GODOT!!! JUST LIKE THE ORDINARY GODOT... BUT 100 TIMES MORE EEEVIIIL!!! 
Yes... Master...
...
Onboard Star Destroyer One, Hangar: 
Hey! It's Obi Wan and the others!

Naruhodou-kun!

Did you find the prison where the Alderaan captives are being held?

Not yet, but we found Kyle Hyde and Derek Stiles!

Yo.

What up?

So what did you guys find?

Well, we were ambushed by Darth Maul...

But I kicked his ass!

Yeah... Sure, Mitsurugi...

But it's the truth!

Anyway... Obi Wan interrogated Darth Maul, and he told us that Darth Vader's planning to take over the galaxy!

No surprise there...

But why did he need to capture the people from Alderaan?

Maul fainted before he could get to that part, unfortunately...

Hmm... Don't you guys find it strange?

Strange?

What are you talking about?

First we encountered General Grievous... Then you guys were ambushed by Darth Maul... And we were chased by an AT-ST.

What are you getting at, Odoroki?

I think Darth Vader knew that we were coming. That's why he gathered all those henchmen!

B-But... We finished them all off!

Except for Anakin...
???: Or me!
*A voice is suddenly heard! Everyone with lightsabers ignite them immediately, while the gun-weilders prepare to shoot at anything that moves...*

Where did that voice come from?!

*Holds lightsaber* It sounds... so familiar...
???: What's the matter? Can't even recognize me?!
*The owner of the voice jumps down from a platform above!*

Sensei! Watch out!

*Turns around* What the?!
NO WAI!!! 
Surprised to see me?

&
GODOT?! 
That's DARTH GODOT, bitches!!!
*Godot uses Force Push on Naruhodou and Mitsurugi and shove them onto a wall!*

Naruhodou-kun! Mitsurugi-kun!

Why, you wanna be next, Mayoi?

GAH!!!

*Turns to Chihiro* Hehe... Surprised, kitten? Thought I was dead? Or would you rather find out what death feels like yourself?
*Godot prepares to attack!*
WATCH OUT!!!... TO BE CONTINUED.
I do not tolerate bullies. Good day.