Do you see the black one...or the white?
Gender: Male
Location: IN SPACE!
Rank: Ace Attorney
Joined: Tue Feb 27, 2007 12:06 pm
Posts: 6664
Yay! I'm finally posting after a long time! This idea was bugging me all last night, so I wanna see how it works out on here!
*camera shows the outside of Phoenix's apartment (his home, not job) with Blue's Clues music playing in the background when Phoenix pokes his head out of the window and waves his hand*

Hi out there! Its me, Nick! Has anyone seen my friend boob?
*camera zooms in on the other window and the viewers see

taking a shower*
random offscreen kids: There she is!!!
*

turns around after hearing the kids and sees the camera lens looking right at her*

YAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *gets out of the shower, thus getting out of the camera's view*

Ok.... well, come on in! *camera enters Phoenix's apartment. The floor is covered in random preschool toys and badly drawn cartoons are hanging by frames along the wall. There is a big cartoonish looking red chair behind Phoenix.

Welcome friends! Glad to see you guys could come! I hope we have a great time together today! My friend boob is over here today because she tells me that a special guest is coming over! She hasn't told me who though....
*a flustered

walks out of the bathroom looking very angry at Phoenix*

Oh, hey boob! Glad to see you could come by! Have you said hi to our guests yet?

Hi??? HI???? I"LL TELL YOU HI!!!!!! *takes a bra from her hand and throws it at Phoenix, but it misses him and hits the camera, shattering the screen.

walks off in a huff*

*walks up to the camera* Well, will you look at that? This must mean that we are gonna play Boob's clues! It must be to help us figure out who our mysterious visitor is gonna be! Well lets see, to play the game, we must find a.....
random offscreen kids: BOOBPRINT!!!!

*in other room* SHUT YOUR CRAP HOLE!!!!!

Thats right! Boobprint! And we put the clue in our.... um....
random offscreen kids(rok): COURT RECORD!!!!

Right! *starts to dance and sing* We gotta find the first boobprint, thats the first clue! Put it in the Court Records cause they're whose clues? BOOB'S CLUES!

*in other room* FOR THE LAST FREAKIN' TIME MY NAME IS MIA!

We gotta find the second boobprint, thats our second clue! Put it in the Court Records cause they're whose clues? BOOBS CLUES!!!! *dances some more* We gotta find the last boobprint, thats our third clue! Put it in the Court Records cause it whose clues? BOOB'S CLUES! *goes to sit in the red chair behind him* We got all three boobprints, we gotta figure out the clues! Whose clues? BOOB'S CLUES! Then we sit down in the thinking chair and Think!.... Think!!!.... Thhiiinnnkk! *gets out of the chair* Cause when we use our minds, take it a step at a time, we can do anything!....... That we wanna do! Yeah! *does jazz hands* So, let's see, hmm.... *stares at bra* How shall we remove this? Hmm.... I know! Maybe we can think it away! C'mon kids! Lets use our brain power and think the boob's clue away! *closes eyes*

*Walks up behind Phoenix and slaps upside the back of his head and removes the bra* Screw you Phoenix! I'm leaving! I am so sick of being treated like some kind of sex symbol! I am more than just a pair of talking breasts ya know! I am a human being! I will not be made fun of because of my.... er.... dominant traits! I'm leaving! *leaves and slams door*

*opens eyes after completely ignoring Mia's prescence* Wow! Whaddya know! I do have the power to make things disappear! I mean.... we have the power! How about we go over to my friend Edgeworth's place and test this power on him?
ROK: YAY!!!!!

*steps outside of the house* Alright everyone! I'm going to need a taxi to go to Mr. Edgeworth's place! On the count of three, help me whistle for the cab! One...... Two..... um...... what comes after two?
ROK: Three!
*

whistles and a taxi cab drives up into the front yard, right next to Phoenix*

hyuck! Where ish yous going my young ladsh?

I'm taking my friends to Edgeworth's house!

Yoush ain'ts witsh the copsh, are yoush? I'm not the one whosh hash been knocking over them mailboshes! Hyuck!

*looks at self* Nope! Just your average Defense Attorney host on a little children's show!

Then hop in Keith!
*

hops into the cab and makes it to Edgeworth's house after running five stop signs, three traffic lights, two hit and runs, and knocking over eight fire hydrants and four mailboxes*

*runs up to Edgeworth's front door and knocks, but there is no answer* Hmm..... no one seems to be home.... what should I do???
ROK: BREAK IN!

Good idea! *grabs a lawn gnome from the front yard and smashes a window and breaks in* Hey! Looks like we are in the kitchen! Oh wow! It's Mr. Salt and Mrs. Pepper!

and

SCREW YOU MR. WRIGHT!!!! *leaves*

Aww.... seems our friends have left us.... *sees a Playboy book on the floor with Mia's picture on it* Oh wow! Looks like our friend Boob has just skidooed into the storybook! Lets go see what she is up to! *starts to dance* Boob skidoo, we can too! *jumps into the playboy and ends up being on the beach, surrounded by many half naked women* Hmm... I wonder where Boob is..... *notices a bra on top of a towel with a picture of a little girl* Hey! Seems like we found a Boob's clue! We should write this down in our....
ROK: Notebook!

NO! ITS OUR COURT RECORDS YOU DUMB IDIOTS!!!!!

I mean.... um... no you silly kids! We write it down in our Court Records! *takes out a pencil and starts to write in the court records* Lets see, circle here, line there, um... squiggle here and there we go! A girl! So, our first clue is a girl. *a dancing image of his crappy drawing appears over his head* Hmm.... a girl..... we need some more clues! *the drawing above his head disappears*

*comes up to Nick in a speedo* Wright-o! How are you my good lad!

Ahh.... Mr. Gant, what are you doing here?

*takes the bra off of the towel* Just getting my bra off of my towel! I need it for my front cover shoot for Playboy!

Um... Mr. Gant, don't you mean Playg...?

PLAYBOY WRIGHT-O!

Um.... yessir..... I'm going to get out of here before I'm scarred for life.....again! *skidoos out of the magazine and sees Edgeworth coming out of the bathroom, about to grab the playboy*

Ahh.... my Playboy! My alone time would have seemed so empty without you! *looks up and sees Phoenix*

Wright! What are you doing in my house?

Hosting a children's show!

Get out of my house!

Yeah. That's what she said!

GET OUT!!!!!! *punches camera, and it goes out*
*black screen fades away, showing the Kurain mansion*

Hey kids! Sorry about that! It seems Mr. Edgeworth was a little bit mean back there! I didn't have time to think him away! But its ok! I'm here to show you a very special friend of mine, if I can find her! *walks into a living room and sees a mess of clothes all over the room, with a bra on top of a platter of burgers* Holy cow!!!! *runs up to the burgers* It seems we found our second boob's clue! Lets write in down in our Court Records! Um..... what is it?
ROK: Burg...

*punches all of the random offscreen kids* Burgers Mr. Nick!

Alright! Burgers... lets see, we draw these lines, color in between the lines, add some mold and voila! Burgers! Now, lets see.... *a dancing girl and a platter of horribly drawn burgers are flying over Phoenix's head* We got a girl.... and some burgers.... It can't be a girl made out of burgers! We'll need to find another clue! *drawings above his head vanish* Oh hi Pearls! I didn't see you come in! What are you doing in your mommy's wedding gown? And why is it messy in here?

Oh! Hi Mr. Nick! Sorry about the mess! I was looking for mommy's wedding gown and I haven't had time to clean up all of the clothes yet! And you don't know why I'm wearing a wedding gown? I'm getting married!

At 8 years old? Pearls! Thats great! Who is the lucky bachelor?

*walks in from another room, still wearing a thong, and a skimpy bikini top* Ahoy Wright-o! We meet again! Have you met my lucky bride to be? Ohohoho!

I'm getting married to Zeus! He promised to give me lots of candy and the control of thunder if I agreed to give him my body!

Okay!!!! I'm going back home! Too many weird things happening here!
*camera fades out, then fades back in and shows Phoenix in his thinking chair*

Hmm.... I need to hurry up and find the last boobprint before I see anymore horrid sights....
Random singing voices: Mailtime.... MAILtime!..... MAILTIME!..... MAILTIME!!!!!!!!!!

Mail's here!!!!! *gets up and starts to sing and dance* Oh, its the mail, it never fails, it makes me want to wag my tail, when it comes I want to wail! MAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!
*a mailbox pops up in the room and Phoenix reaches in and takes out a letter*

Hmm.... I wonder what this one says....:
Dear Mr. Wright,
Shut up you freakin' piece of crap! I have had it up to hear with all of your constant showtunes and happy dances. I swear I am this close to killing you! If you continue to keep this up, I will find a way to dispose of your corpse in such a way that the cops will never find it! And then sip my coffee with my sweet defeat over your lousy pathetic life.
Godot.
P.S. I just got word from my Mia-kins that you have been sexually abusing her. You better keep your eyes open when you sleep tonight. Your death is imminent.

Wow! What a nice guy! *chainsaw sounds are heard in the background* Let's read a picture book! *picks up a book with a picture of a pig on it, and one of Mia's bras that she has left behind is hanging on the book* Oh my goody goody goodness! We have found the final clue! Its a pig! Let me draw..... you know what, screw drawing, I suck! I'll just take a picture! *takes out camera and snaps a pic of the book.
Random offscreen kid: We got three clues!

Dang! You kids are right! We have all three clues! Lets sit in the thinking chair and see who is coming to visit us today! *sits in the chair* Alright, lets see, we got a girl, burgers, and a pig.... hmm..... maybe its a burger shaped like a pig, who eats little girls???........ No.... um... I got it! Its a female pig... who eats lots of burgers! OINK! We just figured out Boob's clues! *gets up and starts to dance and sing*
We just figured out boob's clues! We just figured out boob's clues! We just figured out boob's clues! Because we're really smart! Yeah!
*there is a sudden knock on the door*

It must be our little farmy friend! Lets go pay our little oinkster a warm hello! *gets up and opens the door*

Hey Nick! How is it going? Mia told me she was going to be here and...

*pets Maya on the head* Aww.... who's a good wittle piggy? You are yes you are! Does the wittle piggy want some burgers? OINK OINK!

NICK! How dare you make fun of me! Just because I eat alot! I'm a growing girl you know!

*completely ignoring Maya* Does the wittle piggy wanna get fat and get served as a side of ham? Oh yes she does!

Can it you numbskull! *kicks him in the nuts* Leave me alone and don't ever talk to me again! And forget about coming to Pearly's wedding!!!! *leaves*

Oh..... the pain..... shoulda wore a cup....... well..... until next time kiddies..... I'll see you soon.... *starts to cry as the show ends*
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*watching TV* Oh my! How educational! Now I know to wear a cup the next time I'm in the company of a hungry teenage girl!

Oh honey! You coming to bed?

Yes God.
On April 3, 2016, Court Records Forums experienced a miracle upon that day.
CatMuto wrote:
Pierre wrote:
Man...that looks dull...this actually makes me worried for KH3 (since that team worked on the battle system)
I feel the same
Last edited by dullahan1 on Tue Aug 21, 2007 12:51 am, edited 2 times in total.