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Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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Title: Futility of evidance and miracles.
Author: Mr Gutsy(me)
Rating: G
Genre: Angsty.
Status: Completed ( I think so anyway)
Pairing:None.
Summary: A short oneshot what if Phoenix screwed up in 2-4 at the very end based on the games bad ending.
Proof reading by Lida Rose

It had all hung on one piece of evidence. Just one simple piece of evidence to the right person, and something miraculous would have happened. It had all seemed so close, within his grasp. Maya would be freed and justice and truth would have prevailed. It was never to be.

A wrong turn at the last moment had robbed Phoenix of his chance to get that two faced murdering Engarde caught and jailed for his crimes, instead the bastard had gotten off completely scot-free, it was a moment he’d never forget in that district courtroom, the Judge had declared Phoenix’s reasoning to be insane and had declared the trial to be over.

The stuffy and claustrophobic little courtroom went quiet as the spiky haired lawyer presented his final evidence to the court, he’d been so convinced he’d solved the case and got what they’d needed in order to secure the guilty verdict and save the day; that at first the silence hadn’t rung true. When the judge didn’t speak up after a few moments Phoenix realised something was amiss he looked up to the Judges bench, and with horror, he saw, rather than understanding on the Judges face, it was confusion and impatience.

“Mr Wright,” he began solemnly, “No one understands what nonsense you’re babbling about anymore. In my opinion, it’s clear to me who the innocent and guilty party is in this case. In light of your ludicrous suggestions your request is denied.” he said, gently and deliberately much like a father would to a confused child. It was meant to be soothing and reassuring, but to Phoenix it sounded like a death knell. “No..” he muttered weakly. “No...”

With the last ounce of his strength and iron will Phoenix seized his last chance to make a turnabout, “Your Honour, WAIT! “ Phoenix yelled wildly and gestured ... desperately, “HOLD IT!!! I beg you, one more chance! I know what and to whom we should present the evidence to. It’s the tape of the murder; we need to present it to De Killer!! NOW! Please!!”

The murmurs in the court room fell deadly silent, everyone’s eyes were on the judge awaiting his endorsement or condemnation. An eternity seemed to pass, then the judge inclined his head gently, “I’m sorry Mr Wright, but my patience has run out. I know you want to do more for your client but you’ve done all you can now.“ It was both a dismissal and a warning, a gentle one at that, Desperation stuck “Anything, please, just one more chance!!” the last few words spoken with a desperate crackle to them. This can’t be happening! I thought we’d had it.. what went wrong... what did I do wrong? Phoenix thought desperately grasping his face with hands in defeat. So close.. so close...

With a small shake of his head the Judge swept aside the defences weak protest, “If there are no more objections from either the defence or the prosecution, I will now hand down my verdict. This court finds the defendant Matt Engarde, not guilty of the murder of Juan Corrida. It’s all right now Mr Wright, You’ve won.” Not guilty...No your Honour...you don’t understand...he is guilty! He’s a monster! He drove an innocent woman to her death all over petty rivalry, he's a monster can't you see?!

An eruption of cheers and confetti rained down from the public gallery as Engarde’s army of fans toasted the verdict. Engarde himself was relishing in it, grinning broadly waving to his fans and playing up to his reputation as being ‘refreshing as a spring breeze’, yet trying to be bashful at the same time.

“Dudes!! Thanks. This is awesome and everything, but...it wasn’t me that did it. Mr Lawyer dude over there’s the real hero, he got me out of a right pickle! Thanks dude!” Phoenix had looked up then to see Engarde giving him a thumbs-up and a flash of a predatory grin just for the smallest of an instant, Phoenix hadn’t had to try to discern the meaning as it was apparent, our little secret it said. Our little secret indeed...Phoenix thought bitterly, you bastard.

It was too much for him, Phoenix had packed up his court record as fast as humanly possible and stormed out past a concerned Mia, Phoenix, are you all right, I didn’t know this would happen I’m sure Maya’s fine... she'd said trying to placate him, sooth his worries. She was concerned for him but that didn’t matter now. He had to leave, his faith in justice damaged irreparably, as he walked towards the exit of District Courtroom 3 he bore a final glance over to the prosecutors bench, where Edgeworth was talking with Franziska.

Edgeworth had his back turned, I know Edgeworth, I’ve betrayed you and Maya’s trust, worst of all I’ve let a murdering sociopath go free. Thought Phoenix sadly, I’m sorry as he reached the door, a small snatch of conversation drifted to his ears from the prosecution’s bench “Why is he so upset Miles,” Von Karma demanded confusion written across her face, “His perfect defence record is maintained yet he seems distressed. What is the cause of this?!” Phoenix didn’t stay for Edgeworths reply, knowing that despite his best attempts to give an explanation, she would never understand, what it meant to chase the truth and nothing else.

The rest of that bitter spring afternoon and the days after that passed by in a daze, Phoenix spent those days wandering the streets aimlessly his motivation gone, what made him tick, that personal fire extinguished. His phone rang once or twice but he didn’t want to face up to the very people he’d failed so he’d ignored it until the battery itself flickered and died. This feeling was only sharpened a few days later by the news pronouncing the ‘guilt’ of Adrian Andrews and being sent to death row. It was too much, Phoenix thought despondently maybe a miracle was never meant to happen because they simply don’t exist.
Fin.

I hope you enjoyed this, comments critiques and insults are all welcome.

Last edited by Mr Gutsy on Sat Jun 27, 2009 4:00 am, edited 2 times in total.
Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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A.K.A. Court or Court-Records.

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Location: FL

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Joined: Sun Mar 30, 2008 4:45 pm

Posts: 105

It's sad, but excellent.
I feel like this came from the game though. >.>?
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Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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Loading personality, G.A.I v1.0

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Its born from the dud ending which you get if you screw up the evidence presenting at the very end IE: present evidence to anyone else other than the tape to De Killer. Perhaps I should have made that a little clearer. I'll go edit that now.

Last edited by Mr Gutsy on Sat Jun 27, 2009 1:56 am, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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A.K.A. Court or Court-Records.

Gender: None specified

Location: FL

Rank: Desk Jockey

Joined: Sun Mar 30, 2008 4:45 pm

Posts: 105

Ahh. Alright then. Fits the part perfectly.
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Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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You’re so small in such a big world...

Gender: Female

Location: In front of the computer, where else?

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:25 am

Posts: 1720

Duuuuuuuuuude, this is sad. A well-written one-shot, but depressing.

...I like it!

Hm...Poor Phoenix...

I noticed a few little spelling and grammatical errors, but that's just because I'm nit-picky. :D
Avatar drawn by MC_Kitten, edited by Slezak
Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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Loading personality, G.A.I v1.0

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Joined: Fri Jun 26, 2009 11:08 pm

Posts: 17

Thanks for the feedback!
As for the grammar and spelling screw ups by all means light 'em up and I'll fix them. I proof read the blasted thing for about half an hour and I knew I'd miss some of them.
Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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You’re so small in such a big world...

Gender: Female

Location: In front of the computer, where else?

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:25 am

Posts: 1720

Mr. Gutsy, you just came to the wright person for this. XD
Spoiler: Proof Of Just How Nit-Picky I Am (Take No Offense, Please)
Mr Gutsy wrote:
It had all hung on one piece of evidence. Just one simple piece of evidence to the right person, and something miraculous would have happened. It had all seemed so close, within his grasp. Maya would be freed and justice and truth would have prevailed. It was never to be.

A wrong turn at the last moment had robbed Phoenix of his chance to get that two- faced, murdering Engarde caught and jailed for his crimes, instead the bastard had gotten off completely Scot-free, it was a moment he’d never forget in that district court (No hyphen needed) room, the judge had declared Phoenix’s reasoning to be insane and had declared the trial to be over.

The stuffy and claustrophobic little court(No need for a space) room went quiet as the spiky haired lawyer presented his final evidence to the court, (accidental extra space) he’d been so convinced he’d solved the case(, or ;) that he’d gotten what they’d needed in order to secure the guilty verdict and save the day (again, either a , or a ; should go here.) that at first, the silence hadn’t rung true. When the Judge didn’t speak up after a few moments, Phoenix realized something was amiss He looked up to the judge's bench and, with horror, he saw, rather than the understanding ("look" or "expression" should go here.)on the judge's face, it was confusion and impatience.

“Mr. Wright,” he began solemnly, “No one understands what nonsense you’re babbling about anymore. In my opinion, it’s clear to me who the innocent and guilty party is in this case. In light of your ludicrous suggestions your request is denied,” he said, gently and deliberately, much like a father would to a confused child. It was meant to be soothing and reassuring, but to Phoenix it sounded like a death knell. “No..” he muttered weakly. “No...”

With the last ounce of his strength and iron will Phoenix seized his last chance to make a turnabout, “Your Honor, WAIT! “ Phoenix yelled wildly and gestured...desperately. “HOLD IT!!! I beg you, one more chance! I know what and to whom we should present the evidence to. It’s the tape of the murder, we need to present it to De Killer!! NOW! Please!!”

The murmurs in the court room fell deadly silent, everyone’s eyes were on the judge, awaiting his decision(: or ; would fit better here) his endorsement or condemnation. An eternity seemed to pass, then the judge inclined his head gently, “I’m sorry, Mr. Wright, but you’ve done all you can. I know you want to do more for your client, but you’ve done all you can now. (Accidental space here.)“ It was (Move the word "both" to here instead. Trust me, it'll make more sense. ;)) a dismissal and (Another accidental extra space) a warning, a gentle one at that. Desperation struck. “Anything(comma or exclamation point should go here.) please, just one more chance!!” the last few words spoken with a desperate crackle to them. This can’t be happening! I thought we’d had it.. what went wrong... what did I do wrong? Phoenix thought, desperately grasping his face with hands in defeat. So close...so close...

With a small shake of his head the judge swept aside the defense's weak protest, “If there are no more objections from either the defense or the prosecution, I will now (I think "hand down" would be a better phrase here.) my verdict. This court finds the defendant, Matt Engarde (either a "," or a "..." should go here.) not guilty of the murder of Juan Corrida. It’s all right now, Mr. Wright. You’ve won.” Not guilty....(There doesn't need to be any space here.) No, Your Honor...(Again. No space is needed after a "...") you don’t understand...he is guilty! He’s a monster! He drove an innocent woman to her death ("all" doesn't need to be here.) over petty rivalry. He's a monster! Can't you see?(Yet another accidental space.)!

An eruption of cheers and confetti rained down from the public gallery as Engarde’s army of fans toasted the (accidental extra space) verdict. Engarde himself was relishing in it, grinning broadly(extra space unnecessary.), waving to his fans and playing up to his reputation as being ‘refreshing as a spring breeze’, yet tryingto be (extra space again) bashful at the same time.

(Extra space) Dudes!! Thanks. This is awesome and everything, but...(No space here) it wasn’t me that did it. (Just because I hate the usage of two of the same words in a row, I omitted "It was") Mr. Lawyer dude over there ("he" wouldn't be correct here, just so you know. If you believe Matt would throw that word in, ignore this edit.) got me out of a right pickle! Thanks dude!” (Tsk. Another extra space.) Phoenix had looked up then to see Engarde giving him (I think "a" would fit better here.) thumbs-up (I think "sign" should go here.) and a (Just because I hate the use of two of the same word in one sentence, I'd change "small" to "short," or omit the word entirely) flash of a predatory grin just for the smallest of an instant. Phoenix hadn’t had to try to discern the meaning (I'm thinking about adding "as" in here. Just a suggestion.) it was apparent, our little secret (Yup. Another extra space) it said. Our little secret indeed...(Extra "." not necessary.)Phoenix thought bitterly, you bastard.

It was (Another one) too much for him, Phoenix had packed up his court records as fast as (Omit "was." I think it's unnecessary.) humanly possible and stormed out past a concerned Mia.
"
Phoenix, are you all right? I didn’t know this would happen. I’m sure Maya’s fine..." she'd said, trying to placate him, sooth his worries. She was concerned for him, but that didn’t matter now. He had to leave, his faith in justice damaged irreparably, as he walked towards the exit of District Courtroom 3, he bore a final glance over to the prosecutor's bench, where Edgeworth was talking with Franziska.

Edgeworth had his back turned. I know, Edgeworth, I’ve betrayed you and Maya’s trust, worst of all I’ve let a murdering sociopath go free, thought Phoenix sadly, I’m sorry. as he reached the door, (And another extra space by mistake) a small snatch of conversation drifted to his ears from the prosecutions(You did it again. I'm not sure whether the apostrophe should go before or after the "s." And by "it," I meant you put in an extra space. :D) bench “Why is he so upset, Miles?” Von Karma demanded, confusion written across her face. “His perfect defense record is maintained, yet he seems distressed. What is the cause of this?!” Phoenix didn’t stay for Edgeworth's reply, knowing that, despite his best attempts to give an explanation, she would never understand(Comma not needed) what it meant to chase the truth and nothing else.

The rest of that bitter spring afternoon and the days after that passed by in a daze. Phoenix spent those days wandering the streets aimlessly, his motivation gone, what made him tick, that personal fire extinguished. His phone ("Had"=Grammatically incorrect) rang once or twice[b], but he didn’t want to face up to the very people he’d failed, so he’d ignored it until the battery itself flickered and died. This feeling was only sharpened a few days later by the news pronouncing the ‘guilt’ of Adrian Andrews and being sent to death row. It was too much(Comma inside the italics) Phoenix thought despondently. Maybe a miracle was never meant to happen because they simply(either "simply" or "just" covers it. You don't need both. I personally like "simply better, which is why I omitted "just." However, if you prefer "just," omit "simply" please) don’t exist.

Spoiler: Something I Noticed
You made very few mistakes, but you made the same ones multiple times. Please don't think you made a lot of errors because you didn't.

Avatar drawn by MC_Kitten, edited by Slezak
Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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Loading personality, G.A.I v1.0

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Cheers Lida, I've taken what you said and edited accordingly, the only thing I'll contest is defence beng spelt with a c rather than an s, thats most likely because its the UK spelling over the US. You also got credit underneath the summary for your work. :will:
Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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You’re so small in such a big world...

Gender: Female

Location: In front of the computer, where else?

Rank: Ace Attorney

Joined: Sat Apr 26, 2008 2:25 am

Posts: 1720

Yeah. UK spelling would be "c" instead of "s." Wow. Now that I'm not so focused on fixing my highlighting, I noticed a couple things I missed. *blushes*
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Re: Futility of evidance and miracles.Topic%20Title
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Ja, that was well-written. I'd contemplated the idea of a oneshot detailing the short term events following the "incorrect" 2-4 ending. That said, it wasn't unique. If you win points for anything, it's for using grammatically correct English, descriptive text, and sequencing.

GJ, here's a cookie! :cookie:
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